Radhika (name changed), 26yrs old, young lady from Mumbai consulted me for clarity on how to handle her anger. As an independent urban indian woman she found it really disturbing that every time she got angry her family and friends pin-pointed that she had too much of an attitude. Her mind failed to understand when she was given the right to express joy by smiling and laughter, then "Why didn't she have the right to get express frustration by getting angry?"
Mohit (name changed), 36yrs old, corporate professional, daunting husband and father of two beautiful daughters, faced the same situation at both work and home. Everyone loved him and praised him, but that one day when he would get angry, suddenly he would become the "black sheep". He also had the same question "why cann't I get angry?"
Anger is one of the most common emotions that the mind-body-soul complex exhibits. It's also one of the most misunderstood and misused emotions. Let me explain this in a little more detail:
Origin of Anger?
Anger has two points of origin:
a. biological - A biological hyperactive brain decreases the tolerance limit of the brain. Clinical diagnosis of impulse control issues, borderline personality traits, schizophrenia and bipolar (mania or depression) are conditions which lead to decreased tolerance and increased expression of explosive anger.
b. psychological - the lack of control over one's environment leads to extreme irritation that's most easily expressed as anger.
Why is anger misunderstood?
a. Family and friends- almost never understand the origin of an individuals anger. They mostly try to "counsel" by asking the person to "tame down his anger", which in most conditions is futile. Most people wouldn't be preoccupied until their relative doesn't get physically abusive.
b. Self - Most individuals feel a sense of "guilt" or "remorse" after getting angry. They explain others and themselves that they will "suppress" it the next time. They spend 10 times more psychological energy in trying to suppressing it and getting 100 times more frustrated.
Why is anger misused?
a. Negative Conditioning - The human brain works on many logical assumptions. One of them is that it automatically adapts behavior patterns which have shown positive results in the past. A few successful episodes of utilizing anger to gain what one wants automatically makes it the preferred emotion in any "problem solving" condition. Negative conditioning is dangerous as it slowly generates negativity along with anger, leading the mind into thinking negative first.
b. Short term vs long term gains - Anger is extremely useful emotion in immediately influencing a situation.But on the long term it can lead to negative changes in personal, professional and financial life.
c. Negative Image - No one likes to be around an angry and irritable person. People tend to form a negative image about a person who remains angry.
Remember that through a professional personality analysis and emotional management, Anger can be fully controlled and utilized for personal, professional, social and financial growth.
For Personalized Designed Anger Management techniques for You, contact me at-
Dr.Hemant MittaL
Motivational Speaker - Mind-Body Healer
(MBBS, PG.DPM, M.D.(Mind Mantra Wellness Concepts - Mumbai))
(Specialize in Emotional, Behavioural, Sleep, Memory, Concentration and Sexual Health)
(www.mindmantra.in)
Contact at -
(MBBS, PG.DPM, M.D.(Mind Mantra Wellness Concepts - Mumbai))
(Specialize in Emotional, Behavioural, Sleep, Memory, Concentration and Sexual Health)
(www.mindmantra.in)
Contact at -
Email - eksoch@gmail.com
Twitter - http://twitter.com/Hemant_MittaL
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