The low after the High

The Low after the High

"Every action in the universe is targetted for happiness" - ancient Hindu Text.

Happiness is a powerful force that attracts every single organism in the universe towards it. Its the power within this emotion that motivates an individal to perform even the impossible tasks.

In todays world, of all the forms of happiness, the greatest is experienced when a desire or expectation comes true. The commonest examples are the girl/boy of your dreams saying yes to your proposal, getting instant fame, winning a contest, your team winning a big game, getting a better job, getting into college, shifting to a new home, a senior accepting he is wrong, etc.

The greater your expecatation the greater the happiness.

Expecation and desired based happiness follows a "bells curve". Step by step, there is a gradual built up of expecations. This eagerly increases the need to attain success. As the built up keeps happening, the need to reach the final step increases. A step before the finally being labeled as success, the need for it is so high that the emotional system is charged with unimaginable amount of enegry. On attaining success, the emotional volcano finally explodes, leading to uncontrolled feeling of happiness and joy.

A few hours or days (depending on the emotional involvement), the mind finds itself handicapped to maintain the same levels of euphoria. If left unattended, as in most cases, this subconsciously starts decreasing happiness and increasing sadness. Thou the inital steps of decent are not conciously notable, its only after few days or weeks that the individual starts comparing the present situation with that heightend moment of happiness, creating a comparative low for himself/herself. If left unattended it subconciously triggers an adjustment problem with the current situation leading to two or more of the following emotional and behavioral problems.

1. Increased mental restlessness. Constant racing of thoughts about present and past situation.
2. Avoiding friends, family or office-mates. Loneliness starts to become a friend.
3. Feeling sad of not having the same happiness.
4. Fear that current situation might not improve or people around might be judging one's attitude/personalities.
5. Mood swings - sudden changes in mood. From being happy at one minute to sad the other.
6. Increased negativity leading to anger and irritation against near and dear ones.
7. Decreased interest in physical intimacy or sexual pleasure.
8. guilt or self-blame for taking wrong decisions.
9. Intense need to change the current situation for better.

How to Come out of this adjustment problem?

a. Some who can listen to you. - To talk it out is a very important cathartic process. It means you friends, family or a professional listen to what you are saying. Listening means that they hear you out completely, it doesnt mean that they give their counter opinion.

b. Counseling - a session where tools like CBT, REBT, NLP can be used to regulate the thought process and chanelize the energy towards positivity.

c. SOS help - if the stress is increasing at uncontrolable rates, a childs dose of non-sedative, non-addictive anti-stress medication can be given for immediate use.

d. in moderate to severe cases a combination therapy of counseling along with medications has to be used. If not done so changes in the brain structure can happen due to the altered blood supply, leading to long term body-mind health problems.


Thanks for reading,

Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS, PGDPM)
emotional, behavioral, memory, sleep and sexual health consultant at Mind Mantra
for free email consultancy - eksoch@gmail.com