How a Shrink can cure your Acne?

Acne is one of the most common beauty disorders to affect boys, girls, men and women all over the world.

Billions of dollars are spent every year on its cure.
One of the main reasons for Recurring Acne is STRESS.

Has the time come for Indian Society to break its taboo. Is it time for the Indian Society to look at conquering Stress and Acne by meeting a Shrink (psychiatrist/psychologist)?

Though Stress is not the only cause of Acne, it has proved that Many times its one of the causes that is never treated leading to recurrent acne attacks.

A new approach in medicine, where dermatologist work in hand with psychiatrist/psychologists has proven:

1. repressed and negative memories to be extremely high among patients with recurrent acne

2. clinical levels of anxiety, restlessness and depression associated with increased hormonal and steroidal secretion within the body which leads to acne.

3. exams, relationships failure, job interviews, marriage interviews, very important occasions were looking beautiful is essential raise the stress levels hundreds of times.
The brain tries to compensate, leading to increased Acne.


Acne itself leads to decreased self worth and self image.
Decreases the confidence to do an action.

Consulting a dermatologist and also counseling from a good psychiatrist/psychologist can help you
1. save money,
2. save the pain of spending on un-necessary expensive creams/treatment,
3. increase confidence
4. make your skin shine and glow.


BE PRACTICAL, BE HAPPY... DON'T LIVE UNDER MYTHS.

for further questions feel free to email me -

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com
www.mindmantra.in

10 Sexual Health issues every Indian Couple goes through

As a Psychiatrist and Relationship Counselor I get the opportunity to meet a lot of people who are gracious enough to share with me, their deepest secrets.

SEX is one issue where both men and women are always hesitant to talk about.

Most of them, want to talk about it, but take sometime to be comfortable and open up their inner mind.

Restless thoughts regarding sex are like a monster that keeps eating the peace of mind, and that's why I encourage talking about your inner sexual feelings

The following statistics are a proof of how much Emotional Pain we could save the society from if we just spoke about SEX in a progressive way.

1. 54% men and 25% women think about sex on a daily basis. - Unable to express these thoughts leads to restlessness, anger and decreased concentration.

2. Average Married Indian couple has sex about 70-90 times a year.

At 1/3 of these encounters are a complete disaster with either one or both partners not being satisfied.

3. More than 80% women think of sexual activity as activity to prove they are loved.

4. More than 50% of women have fake an orgasm, just to keep their husband happy.

Many of these live under the "delusion" that they are able to satisfy not only their wife, but also go ahead and give wrong advice to other man

5. Lack of sexual satisfaction makes a woman feel unwanted, hopeless, restless and depressed.
Its one of the most common reasons for Clinically high levels of depression among married woman.

This is also one of the prime reasons for woman looking to have extra-marital relationships.

6. 80% of Men doubt their sexual capacity at least once in life. Most of them are not happy with their sexual performance, but scared to talk about the same to a professional.
Majority of the advice they get from friends, family or wife increases their restlessness.

7. 2/3 people feel they don't have enough satisfying sex. But lack of proper emotional communication leads to the same.

8. A great majority of men use sex as a way to show their "macho" or "male" supremacy over their female partner.
Henceforth sexual activity becomes a ego tussle.

9. Mutual respect plays a vital role in a satisfying sex life.
82% of sexually satisfied say they feel respected and loved by their partner during sex.

59% are looking for more love and romance in the act.

10. A great majority Indian males and females only focus on the sexual intercourse phase of sex.
Build-up, Fore-play, after-play, experimentation phases are never talked about.

Sex is a beautiful and divine activity. It's a gift of god to increase happiness, increase body immunity, decrease body pains provided it has the right mixture of LOVE to it..

If an individual is not Lovingly Sexually satisfied he/she will fall prey to psychological problems like restlessness, depression, sleep disturbance, body pains, masturbation addiction, pornography (both visual and reading) addiction, increased need to seek satisfaction outside relationship.

Dont just have sex... HAVE LOVING SEX..

for any further query feel free to email me-

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com
www.mindmantra.in

The MONSOON DIET for a HEALTHY SELF


The Monsoon Has Arrived. This is the season when the body-mind complex will be exposed to increased Pollution, Stress, Depression, Restlessness, Fried Food, Alcohol and/or Smoking it produces a lot of NEGATIVE CHEMICALS.

Detoxification Diets are providing the body with POSITIVE CHEMICALS which will restore the skin, organs, mind environment.

10 food stuff's that should be regular in your diet to help generate more and more POSITIVE CHEMICALS for healthy physical and psychological self.-


1.Lemon:
Lemons are a staple of many detox diets, and there is good reason for this. Firstly, lemons are packed with antioxidant vitamin C, which is great for the skin and for fighting disease-forming free-radicals.
Furthermore, the citrus fruit has an alkaline effect on the body, meaning that it can help restore the body's pH balance, benefitting the immune system. Try starting your day with hot water and a slice of lemon to help flush out toxins and cleanse your system.


2.Ginger:
If too much fatty food or alcohol has caused problems for your digestive system, it may be worthwhile adding some ginger to your diet.
Ginger is great for reducing feelings of nausea, but it can help improve digestion, beat bloating and reduce gas.
In addition to this, ginger is high in antioxidants and is good for boosting the immune system. To give your digestion a helping hand, try sipping on ginger tea or adding some freshly grated ginger to a fruit or vegetable juice.


3.Garlic:
Garlic has long been known for its heart benefits, however the pungent food is also good at detoxifying the body.
Garlic is not only antiviral, antibacterial and antibiotic, but it contains a chemical called allicin which promotes the production of white blood cells and helps fight against toxins.

Garlic is best eaten raw, so add some crushed garlic to a salad dressing to boost its flavour and your health at the same time.


4.Artichoke:
If you have recently been overindulging in fatty foods and alcohol, adding some steamed globe artichoke leaves to your meals is a great way to help get your body back on track.
Globe artichokes are packed with antioxidants and fibre and can also help the body digest fatty foods. On top of this, globe artichoke is renowned for its ability to stimulate and improve the functions of the liver - the body's main toxin-fighting tool


5.Beetroot:
For those needing a quick health-boosting shot of nutrients, you can't do much better than beetroot. Packed with magnesium, iron, and vitamin C, the vegetable has recently been hailed as a superfood due to its many reported health benefits.
Not only is beetroot great for skin, hair and cholesterol levels, but it can also help support liver detoxification, making it an ultimate detox food. To enjoy its benefits, try adding raw beetroot to salads or sipping on some beetroot juice.


6.Green tea:
While it's not technically a food, no detox plan would be complete without regular consumption of essential liquids. Fluids are essential for keeping our organs healthy and helping to flush toxins from the body, and drinking green tea is a great way of boosting your intake. Green tea is not only a good weight-loss drink, but it is extremely high in antioxidants. Research has also suggested that drinking green tea can protect the liver from diseases including fatty liver disease.


7.Cabbage:
Many celebs have resorted to the cabbage soup diet to help lose weight and get in shape quickly before a big event, however cabbage is not only good for weight loss - it is also an excellent detoxifying food. Like most cruciferous vegetables (including broccoli and sprouts), cabbage contains a chemical called sulforaphane, which helps the body fight against toxins. Cabbage also supplies the body with glutathione; an antioxidant that helps improve the detoxifying function of the liver.


8.Fresh fruit:
Fresh fruits are high in vitamins, minerals, antioxidants and fibre= and are also low in calories, making them an important part of a detox diet. If you're after brighter eyes and skin, shinier hair and improved digestion, try boosting your intake of fruit and eating from a wide variety of different kinds. The good news is fruit is easy to add to your diet, so try starting your day with a fresh fruit salad or smoothie and snacking on pieces of fruit throughout the day.


9.Brown rice:
If you want to cleanse your system and boost your health, it is a good idea to cut down on processed foods. Instead, try supplementing your diet with healthier whole grains such as brown rice, which is rich in many key detoxifying nutrients including B vitamins, magnesium, manganese and phosphorous. Brown rice is also high in fibre, which is good for cleansing the colon, and rich in selenium, which can help to protect the liver as well as improving the complexion.

10.Watercress:
Like most green herbs and vegetables, watercress is an excellent health-booster and detox food. Firstly, watercress leaves are packed with many vital detoxifying nutrients, including several B vitamins, zinc, potassium, vitamin E and vitamin C. Secondly, watercress has natural diuretic properties, which can help to flush toxins out the body. To reap the benefits of this nutritious food, try adding a handful of watercress to salads, soups and sandwiches.


(Inspired from an ORIGINAL ARTICLE Taken From Yahoo!)


Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com

Sushmita Sen Getting Married

“I will get married soon. It is in the pipeline. I believe in the institution of marriage.” - Sushmita Sen

Sushmita Sen recently stated that she is looking to get married soon.

Many of her male and female fans from all over the country are already showering "congrats" and "blessing" upon her.

What makes me laugh is at the irony of how hypocrite the society is.

Just because she is such a famous person everyone is praising her.

But what about the "traditional Indian marriage guidelines" she has broken-

1. She has been involved in relationships before marriage.
2. Obviously she is no Virgin.
3. She has 2 adopted daughters. So she is a mother even before marriage.
4. She has battled psychological problems like weight gain and depression.
5. She has exposed enough for thousands of men to have fantasized about her.

Had "normal girl" done any 2 of these, people would be labeling her with names ranging from "characterless" to "mad". And labelled her unfit for marriage.

Sushmita Sen is an example of modern indian woman... but the big question is Indian society ready to accept the concept of "modern indian woman" rather than just accepting Sushmita Sen.

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com

Invisible Psychological Damage that Parents cause to Children

Everyday I see a growing number of parents who are pushing their children to dangerous psychological limits.

Under the umbrella of love and better life for the child, they are exposing their children to such psychological harm that the child can land up having depression, excess aggression, cheating, stealing, lying and cess sexual drive.

One of the main reasons for this phenomenon to happen is "The Glamour Factor".

Fame, Name, Power and Money are becoming the corner-stone of "success".

Gone are the days when "success" was equated to being happy and peaceful.

Constant comparisons, desires to create stars, magical thinking are increasingly breaking psychological boundaries of young minds. Leading to dangerous behavioral practices.

1. Fame and attention at younger and younger ages  -
Media is a money making entity. It has slowly introduced singing, dance, spelling and even cooking as a great way to attain fame/attention at young and younger age.

unfortunately most parents who push their children to "DEVELOP" this natural talents, don't realize that only 1 out of those thousand kids that became famous actually get to live happily.

See what happened to the kids who acted in oscar winning

2. The glamor of crime, criminals and death.
CID is one of the most famous TV Serials to ever hit the indian T.V.
Over the years I have met thousands of people who tell me a common thing - " I watch CID Everyday, It has helped me become  an expert now in criminal psychology and human psychology."

Unfortunately that's like saying that porn movies teach you how to have satisfying sex...

From CID  now the every TV channel has one program focused on crime, murder, death...
While most people look at it with lot of interest, parents don't realize that constant exposure to such program infact triggers a brain to try and attempt the same.
Many of today's juvenile crimes are because the criminal tried to improve upon the ways shown on TV.


3. Magical thinking - instant gratification and instant power.
Books, Serials, Movies that promote instant gratification and instant power are the biggest hallucination a child's brain can be exposed to.
They suddenly remove the desire to work hard and achieve success.
They tell the child to try and achieve everything by easy means.
It's important to remember easy means are not always the best ways out.


BE CAREFUL ON WHAT YOU EXPOSE YOUR CHILD TOO...
IF YOUR CHILD HAS A HABIT TO LIE, STEAL, ROB, BECOME AGGRESSIVE OR IS INVOLVED IN ADDICTIONS/SEXUAL BEHAVIOR... CHECK THE MOVIES, TV SERIALS, BOOKS THAT HE/SHE HAS BEEN READING...

for further, feel free to email me -

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com

8 Nutrients that will help you in Weight loss

1. Monounsaturated fats: Replacing carbohydrates in your diet with monounsaturated fats will help you slim down by shuttling fat away from your midsection

Where to get it: Avocados, Macadamia nuts, and olive oil are great sources of monounsaturated fats. They also come packaged with great nutrients such as antioxidants (in olive oil), fiber (in avocado), and B-vitamins (in macadamia nuts).

2. EGCG: EGCG or Epigallocatechin gallate is an antioxidant found in green tea (and put in most weight-loss supplements available today). EGCG can increase thermogenesis or heat production through extra calorie burning and the use of stored fat as energy. Some research also shows that EGCG can stop the growth of new fat cells.

Where to get it: The greatest weight loss effects of EGCG are seen when combined with caffeine, as it naturally occurs in green tea.

3. Raspberry ketones: Raspberry ketones are an antioxidant found in raspberries that preliminary research shows have some interesting fat loss effects. Raspberry ketones can increase the production of the muscle-energizing, fat-burning hormone adiponectin as well as directly increasing the burning of stored fat.

Where to get it: You can't come close to getting enough raspberry ketones via eating raspberries so to reap these benefits you'll need to take a concentrated raspberry ketone supplement (they are inexpensive and available at more health food stores). Keep an eye out for more about raspberry ketones and weight loss as new research gets published.

4. Docosahexaenoic acid (DHA): Docosahexaenoic acid or DHA is one of the two omega-3 fats found in oily fish like salmon. DHA can stop growth of young fat cells and actually causes them to die, says research published in the Journal of Nutrition.

Where to get it: To get more DHA in your diet, you can eat more oily fish or just take a fish oil supplement. If you are a vegetarian, pick up an algae-based DHA supplement to reap the same benefits.

5. Acetic acid: Vinegar, a dilute form of acetic acid, has potent glucose-lowering effects. One study in Italy found that when participants added just more than1 tablespoon of vinegar to their meal (as salad dressing) they experienced a 30 percent decrease in their post-meal blood sugar levels. Controlling blood sugar remains an essential component to weight loss and maintaining a lean body.

Where to get it: Adding vinegar to salads should be standard protocol, but if you can manage to find chocolate balsamic vinegar, it makes an excellent addition to a protein-packed chocolate smoothie.

6. Protein: Protein from lean sources like beef, poultry, fish, dairy, or soy are weight loss rock stars. The amino acids that make up protein cause your body to release the fat-burning and energy-stabilizing hormone glucagon. The process of digesting protein also stimulates your body to release the satiety hormone CCK. This one-two punch combined with the fact that it takes your body more energy to digest and breakdown protein compared to carbohydrates or fat makes it a must-have at every meal throughout your day.

Where to get it: The possibilities are endless, but lean proteins like Greek yogurt , cottage cheese, and organic grilled chicken strips are especially convenient.

7. Caffeine: Caffeine is one of the most potent weight loss compounds available to you each and every day. Caffeine blocks the breakdown of a compound call camp, which is responsible for mobilizing stored fats so they can be burned as energy.

Where to get it: If you are looking for a bigger fat-burning boost, then make sure to choose black tea over green tea or light roast coffee over dark roast for a larger dose of caffeine

8. Fiber: Fiber is often touted to be a great nutrient for weight loss because it slows down digestion, allowing for sustained energy and stable blood sugar. However fiber can also optimize hormones released during digestion that are responsible for feelings of hunger and satiety.

Where to get it: Try to get your fiber in its raw form instead of from foods that have been overly processed. The processing of fiber can change its chemical make-up, which can decrease its effectiveness at promoting satiety or lowering cholesterol. Next time you have the choice between oatmeal and cereal made from baked oat crisps, opt for regular oatmeal

(orginal article from Yahoo!)

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com
www.mindmantra.in

Traits of a Male Manipulator

The Male Manipulator

I meet many females who have been USED economically, socially or sexually by Male Manipulators. They fall into deep depression on seeing how a person they LOVED so much is now non-remorseful and inert to their emotional sadness.

There are few points which I would like to mention, A Male manipulator is one who has a very strong personality. They are extremely good actors and know how to conceal their emotions. Always self-centered in every activity of life, but because of their acting skills will show as if they are burning themselves for the benefit of others.

Their mind is always focused on one main objective, that to exploit their prey (specifically females) for either financial, social or sexual purposes.

Some Personality traits that help identify the same-

1. Extremely over-friendly. Always surrounded by an aura of mystery. Their friends or relationships will always be with people in turmoil.

2. Always identify and target females who have been through some emotional trouble. Within hours/days pose themselves to be their strong emotional support. Slowly slowly distance them from all their meaningful relationships.

3. Constant lying and conning is used to impress the victim. Most commonly use of false position, money, astrology, god, philosophy, "sixth sense powers" are used to captivate the victim lady.

4. No regard for feelings or property of others.
There always will be a history of multiple females who have suffered at the hands of such a man. But the manipulator will pose as a "victim" himself and have very convincing "Excuses" for every incident.
When his lies are caught, he will either dissapear from the place or get extremely angry.

5. There way of speaking is always one to impress. Full with "naughty" and "flirty" messages. Making the other person feel wanted and cherished. Main goal is to create an aura of being extremely concerned about you and only you.
When examined with a detail, one will observe that they spend a maximum amount of time talking about themselves and their troubles, their business, their wants and desires, etc etc... While the victim feels "she" is actually helping him out in his problem.
Slowly slowly they create such a web that she is completely engrossed in thinking about him only.

6. Their mind is extremely goal directed. While they never might achieve whatever they purpose to start, they will create an aura that every small victory is in fact a major battle won.
They are very good with words, so will criticize others in ways that seem "positive criticism", but in the end the words will be directed in creating doubt within the mind of their "victim".

7. Goal directed mind, leads to goal directed conversations. Every moment spent with them will be triggered to achieve their goal.
It will seem if they are motivating you to "free" your spirit, when actually they are "trapping" it.
if interested in sex, than conversations will be driven towards relationships, sex and flirt. and if interested in financial gains, will talk about big buisness deals, great money, big houses and big cars without any substantial gain of their own.

8. To create extreme trust levels, they will expose their "inner" truths to the victim. Only for the victim to later understand it was all a lie.
Being professional liars, they tend to cover-up their actual short-comings under the umbrella of words.

9. get aggressive and irritable if the truth is exposed. and Would prefer to run from the situation.

10. They follow the philosophy of a Phyton or boa constrictor snake, that strangulates his victim after gaining complete control over his movements

They will always put the emotion of "trust" as the corner-stone of any relationship.
They will constantly preach of trust and ask for practice of trust.
Once victim falls prey of this emotional trap, they will slowly start keeping a control on her every move.
They want to be always "informed" on what the victim is doing. Under the cover of friendship and care, they will ask more questions than required.
Such is the level of control, that even going to the "loo" without informing them can become anxiety causing.

As they get more and more control over a victim, slowly slowly they will make sure the victim is completely dependent on them for emotional support and need. This will give them chance to manipulate at financial, social and sexual angles without being noticed.

11. They never have true remorse for what they have ever done. And will always act to show how emotionally hurt they are. They are emotionless and self-centered. if they accept mistakes or cry its all shallow acting just to impress the other person.

If you have been conned by a male manipulator or if you know someone who is being conned, please help them.

Feeling used and thrown away is the most self-destroying feeling one can go through. Leading to extreme depression and sadness.

For any further questions email me at

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com
www.mindmantra.in

MEN PSYCHOLOGY - THOSE HIDDEN TEARS!!!

As a psychiatrist traveling through the entire length of beautiful India and the world, one of the erroneous laws that has passed from generation to generation is that
"Men are not supposed to Cry!!!"

It's really stupid, because Men are Emotional beings.... They also feel sadness.. just because of this social law that they have adapted to expressing it in different ways.
At the Mind Mantra Wellness Clinic, I have met hundreds of Men who have not only shed tears but opened their hearts to their deepest sadness and fears.

Its amazing to see that these same men, will never let their friends, family and partners know whats going inside their mind.

As per my experience as a psychiatrist, The common ways in which Men cope with sad emotions can be listed as the following:

1. The lone cry - The most popular way of expressing sadness and one that is most psychologically damaging... 3/5 Men patients I meet at the Mind Mantra Wellness Clinic belong to this category.
Men who belong to this category like to suppress their emotions in-front of everyone, just to release it within the loneliness of their solitude.

Suppressing sadness slowly leads to suppressing love and happiness... and slowly a gloomy and sad aura engulf's them.

They require a lot of compassion, sensitive talk and support. 
If kept suppressed the feelings come out as depression, anger, irritability, false beliefs, fixed and rigid ideology, addictions(alcohol/ciggrates/gambling) and sexual anger.


2. The Drama King - The second type of acting that Most men get into is concealing their feelings by showing excessive care for those around them.
These are the type of guys who seem to always be above feelings. These are the type of people who seem to be concerned about helping others, but are always smiling.

This is a very dangerous technique. It has two ends to it:
a. at one end - the men might be internally comparing himself with others, but outside trying to be strong and helping others.
This leads to inferiority complex, which increases anger, depression, sadness and uncontrolled thoughts
it can also lead to Obsessive compulsive personalities

b. the second end of this extreme where men who master the technique of being detached from feelings become psychological manipulators. Specially manipulating females. 
Manipulation once learned is used to make females subordinate to them in financial, social and sexual terms.

These are very dangerous personalities, and many times trying to help them might lead to self-destruction.
One has to chose very wisely. Mostly professional psychiatrists should be left for the same.


3. The Angry Young Man - There are many men who might never cry, but they are a full of negativity. They are always cursing, finding negative in others, thinking destructive and getting angry for no rhyme or reason.

They are not able to find a positive way to externalise their hurt and therefore they take it out negatively. 
Such personas are like small children. They need a lot of reassurance and love to remove their toxic emotions.

If continued with the same, they might land up in deep depression, sadness, stress cycles, anxiety, sexual frustration, pornography/masturbation addiction.


4. The Emotional One - The guy who is in touch with his emotions will occasionally shed a tear. He won't feel bad about it, cause he is well balanced about it. He is secure enough to know his masculinity.
These make for great communicators, are very up-front direct in their approach, as they can understand emotions so wonderfully they might come out to be too "friendly" with the female gender.

Such guys need long lasting friendships and relationships to keep them positive about life.
If exposed to a heart-breaking relationship. (sudden breakup, being cheated by partner, or non-fullfilling relationship) they land up into major sadness.
Since they are very expressive, depression, sadness, anxiety, tears are easily noticeable by everyone.
Counseling them becomes very difficult as they understand emotions so well... They require professional help.

For any further questions, don't hesitate to email me at eksoch@gmail.com

Dr.Hemant Mittal 
email - eksoch@gmail.com

Parenthood or Fear Factory - Best Career for your Child


Parenthood or fear-factory

Over the last few months at the Mind Mantra Wellness clinic, I have observed an increase in the number of parents I meet suffering from fear, doubt, anxiety and stress related to their children.
While many parents are extremely concerned and want counseling for the the social and sexual behavior their adolescent child are involved into, there is a huge group which is concerned about what "profession" their child should follow to be "successful".

Unfortunately the definition of "successful" for 99.9% means BIG FAT SALARY.

Ironically, when I ask most of them are they happy with their JOB PROFILE, they crib about it, but say they cann't leave because of the money.

Money Trap is leading to mental exhaustion. Mental exhaustion eventually leads to anger, negativity, irritability, lack of sleep and decreased sexual happiness...
As a parent Do you really want to expose your child to all of this???

REMEMBER THE ONLY WAY TO A HAPPY LIFE, is by allowing your children to follow the 3 P’s: passion, purpose, and payment.

If a engine is made to work day after day for 30years it will surely break down more than once. Similarly our brain gets exhausted.
Day after day for more than 30years to do the same kind of work one requires passion.
Passion is the energy that never fizzles out and always keeps you focused. A simple way to uncover your passions is to consider what magazines you love to read or what interests, hobbies, and activities you have always enjoyed.

Simple Passion dies out very soon. It has to be accompanied with Purpose. Purpose comes from having something to contribute and offer others. It is about serving others and extending your support to improve peoples’ lives. What do you want to leave behind as your legacy? The importance of purposeful work can be seen when people leave high paying, prestigious positions to take on more meaningful and fulfilling work despite the pay cut.

Lastly, passion and purpose can be considered a "social activists" bread and butter... The more "capitalist" part of the brain will always feel satisfied with a decent payment related with them. This creates the image of a viable, enjoyable and socially enriching job that provides financial stability and independence.

Money is essential, If we can’t pay our bills or are always struggling financially, we may want to consider another career option. If we aren’t making any money with what we’re doing it’s just a hobby.

Don’t believe that finding work you love isn’t feasible. Even if you can’t change your job due to financial obligations, or because you have insufficient education and experience, this doesn’t mean you can’t learn to engage more fully in your work.


Dr.Hemant Mittal
www.mindmantra.in
email - eksoch@gmail.com

8 ways to stop procrastinating


How many times each day do you try to work yourself up to tackle some undesirable task?

Nothing is more exhausting than the task that is never started.
Here are simple tricks to help you battle the monster of procrastination.

1. Visualization - Positive Stress.

Many times you don't feel the rush to work until you are not pressurized. Visualization is a powerful technique that helps you imagine the end-line much before than it has arrived. This creates positive stress that leads to increased performance.

2. Ask for help.
Why is this so hard?  Because you want to shield your failure under a carpet.
Whenever you are having trouble getting started or not knowing what to do, ask for help and you'll be amazed how much it helps to clear confusion.

3. Remember that most decisions don’t require extensive research
The more you research, the more confused you get. Decisions may go wrong even with the best of researches... don't fear failure... fear inaction.

4. Take a baby step... Right or Wrong?
Many patients I meet fall into the trap of "baby steps".. They try to accomplish one small task a day and for the next three days are sitting idle.. They rationalize it by saying they are taking baby steps while trying to win over procrastination...
Take baby steps, if you are ready to be a baby... a baby is restless to wake up and try again and again..
 

5. The Thoughts of Failure are short-lived.
Thoughts of failure last only 15-20min after starting a work... So start, and soon you will see the thoughts disappear.

6. Morning - Evening Trap....Do it now?
Many of my patients with procrastination fall into the trap of delaying things a few hours. 
Morning becomes afternoon.. Afternoon becomes Evening... Evening becomes Night.. and then guilt takes over... 
Do it now!!!! 
There is no other way.


7. Why take the mental load?
People feel nice in spending hours thinking... Right or wrong.. yes or no... questions and answers... 
Till you don't teach your mind to be silent you will never understand the power of the present.

8. Pay attention to the amount of time you spend working on tasks you dislike.
Give a pat on your back for everytime you complete a disliked task faster than last time. You are getting good at it.
You can keep a diary.. and when you have done 3 disliked tasks faster than before, you can treat yourself to a coffee, a cigrate, a drink or good food.


for any further questions, email me at eksoch@gmail.com

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com
www.mindmantra.in

Intensive Mobile Phone/Computer Use May Affect Young People's Sleep And Mental Health

Young adults who make particularly heavy use of mobile phones and computers run a greater risk of sleep disturbances, stress and symptoms of mental health. "Public health advice should therefore include information on the healthy use of this technology," says researcher Sara Thomee from the Sahlgrenska Academy at the University of Gothenburg, Sweden.

Doctoral student Sara Thomée and her research colleagues at the University of Gothenburg's Sahlgrenska Academy have conducted four different studies looking at how the use of computers and mobile phones affects the mental health of young adults.

1. Stress and sleep disorders

These studies, which included questionnaires for 4,100 people aged 20-24 and interviews with 32 young heavy ICT users, reveal that intensive use of mobile phones and computers can be linked to stress, sleep disorders and depressive symptoms.

"We looked at the effects both quantitatively and qualitatively and followed up the volunteers a year on," explains Thomée, who will present the results in her upcoming thesis. "The conclusion is that intensive use of ICT can have an impact on mental health among young adults."

2. Linked to depressive symptoms

The studies reveal, for example, that heavy mobile use is linked to an increase in sleeping problems in men and an increase in depressive symptoms in both men and women.

"Those who find the constant accessibility via mobile phones to be stressful are most likely to report mental symptoms," says Thomée.

3. Late-night computer use a risk

Frequently using a computer without breaks also increases the risk of stress, sleeping problems and depressive symptoms in women, whereas men who use computers intensively are more likely to develop sleeping problems.

"Regularly using a computer late at night is associated not only with sleep disorders but also with stress and depressive symptoms in both men and women," says Thomée.

4. Need for health advice

A combination of both heavy computer use and heavy mobile use makes the association even stronger. One conclusion is that public health advice to young people should include information on how to use ICT in a healthy way:

"This means taking breaks, taking time to recover after intensive use, and putting limits on your availability," Sara Thomée explains.

(taken from the latest edition of journal on human psychology)

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com

Psychological Analysis of Dying Patients reveals top 5 regrets they had


A study by author Bronnie Ware with dying patients has found out the Top Five Regrets that people have at the last stages of their life -

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

"This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it."

2. I wish I hadn't worked so hard.

"This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence."

3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.

"Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result."

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

"Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying."

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

"This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again."

LIVE YOUR LIFE YOUR STYLE.. and DONT DIE WITH REGRETS

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com

Domestic Violence - Emotional Abuse the non-gender biased abuse.


Yesterday's episode of Satyamev Jayate focused on a very important ghost of the society. Domestic Violence. 

Though Physical Abuse is the one that hits our hearts immediately, we more than often forget the greatest form of domestic violence, Emotional Abuse.

Though yesterday's TV episode focused on the male partners abusing the female partners, Emotional Abuse is a form of hurt that can be perpetuated by either one of the partners.

Emotional Abuse has a greater destructive effect on the mind and body than physical abuse.

Emotional abuse is form of domestic violence that either one of the partners uses to control, degrade, humiliate and punish the spouse (this neutral term will be used to refer to both husband or wife).

While emotional abuse differs from physical abuse, the end result is the same…a spouse becomes fearful of their partner and begins to change their behaviors to keep their partner happy.

The happier their partner, the less domestic violence the spouse has to suffer.

By the time a spouse identifies the true problem they have begun to feel as if they are crazy. They will doubt themselves and their own sense of reality because emotional abuse is meant to cause the victim to question their every thought and behavior.

Below are some tactics an emotional abuser will use:

1. Isolating a spouse from friends and family.

2. Discourage any independent activities such as work; taking classes or activities with family/friends.

3. Accuse their spouse of being unfaithful. Every interaction with a member of the opposite sex is seen with tainted eyes. (remember this is different from pin-pointing on having physical liaison with a single member of the opposite sex.)

4. Expect her/him to partake in sexual activities that he/she is uncomfortable with to prove their love.

5. Using sex as punishment instead of communicating openly their displeasure... This is through forceful sex, irritable comments about sexual performance, degrading sexual self.

6. Constantly criticize the spouses looks, weight, their way of dressing, way of talking, language used to talk.

7. If the spouse does not give into the control they are threatened, harassed, punished and intimidated by the abuser.
Divorce/break-up or causing physical harm are the common threats used by both partners.

8. Some spouses use the children to gain control by undermining the other parent’s authority or threatening to leave and take the children.

9. Control all the financial decisions, refuse to listen to their partner’s opinion, withhold important financial information and make their spouse live on limited resources.

10. Make all major decisions such as where to live, how to furnish the home and what type of automobile to drive.

THE VICTIM BEGINS TO FEEL LIKE A PRISONER OF WAR.

EMOTIONAL ABUSE IS A PSYCHOLOGICAL WARFARE PLAYED BETWEEN TWO PARTNERS.

REASONS FOR EMOTIONAL ABUSE-
Emotional abuse starts when a relationship has some very weak points which have not been worked upon.

1. One or both the partners are very dependent on their respective family/friends

2. Constant introduction of negative thoughts about the relationship, that poison the mind. This is mostly done by close family or friend.

3. Inferiority complex within one or both the partners. It could be related to self-image, looks, financial insecurity.

4. Personality disorders or opposite personalities begin present in one or both the partners.

5. excessive expectations are built around a relationship.

6.  trying to model one's own personality after someone kept in high esteem not realizing the damage down to one's own relationship.

SOLUTIONS?
1. Most important process is to take a break from the relationship. - Remember how beautiful the good times where.

2. Realize the negative influences on the relationship and try to distant yourself from the self.

3. Remember No Hurt is big enough to not be healed by love. But no Love is big enough to resist the power of doubt.
Doubt is not just trust, but also the self-confidence of enjoying being in a relationship..

4. Relationships are a lot about adjustment. Adjustment has to be mutual.
Adjustment doesn't mean that you are losing yourself, adjustment is an opportunity to grow in Love.

for further help, email me at eksoch@gmail.com

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com
www.mindmantra.in

The True Sadhu - Celebrate Life




A few years ago during my MBBS days in Pune, I was sitting having breakfast at a popular joint when a

group of 4 foreigners walked in.
Observing their behavior pattern was amazing. A great learning lesson from the teacher called life.

The entire group was sporting tilaks over their forehead, wearing coloruful Indian attire (kurta's by
the men, salwar-kameez by the women) and had long unwashed hair.  It was as if they had just stepped
out into society after years of pilgrimage.

Their nuances seemed like entertainment for the crowd of local chaps. Jokes, laughs and comments had already flooded the air.

They seemed completely oblivious of what was happening around them. Engrossed in enjoying this moment of life, they were like small children in a play ground.
Smiling to those across the table, sharing jokes among themselves, folding their hands to thank a waiter for his service, clicking photos of the food, exclaiming sounds on satisfaction on every morsel of food eaten... it was a celebration for them.

More they enjoyed, more the people around seemed annoyed. More they celebrated, more the jokes, taunts and comments passed around.

The whole "spectacle" continued for 20 minutes. They walked out thanking the owner for the good food and great service.

No sooner had they left, the chaos seemed to settle and it was back to people shouting at the waiter, complaining on the deteorating food quality and cribbing about the work day ahead.


Don't wait for someone to come and teach you how to be happy - Celebrate every moment of Life... Thats the mark of a Truely enlightened individual.

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com
 

Happy Marriage Foundation - Battle the adjustment problems.



As a counselor and psychiatrist, I have found that one of the most common reasons for new marriage's, specially in Mumbai, to walk down the dark path of sadness, fights and lack of fullfillment is adjustment issues that both the bride and groom.

While the first 6months might seem a great honeymoon period, its during this time that the base for future fights is being laid.

Be it a love marriage or an arranged one, its important to understand that no matter how prepared one comes into marriage its still going to be a completely new physical, emotional, financial, psychological and sexual experience.

When one is exposed to changes at so many levels, the brain-mind complex reacts in different ways.

While very few "mature" people tend to internalize the changes and "adjust" to it, others are more expressive and it comes out as anger, discontent, taunts, stress.

The most common reasons for this to happen-
1. A game of Expectations - Marriage is a game of expectations. It doesn't matter all the the flowery and lovely words spoken during the courtship period. Once married, the burden of expectations starts to dawn.
Time, social responsibilities, family responsibilities, way to take care of each other, physical intimacy, all of these are new learning that take time to learn.

Initially many take it very lightly, but slowly they start reading in-between the lines and creating a lot of anger.

2. Lack of Friends - While most men are expected to decrease the interactions with their friends, women (specially those from other cities) suddenly find themselves without friends.
Making new friends isn't easy. Having friends as good as your childhood friends isn't easy.
It creates a lot of loneliness.
While many wife look towards their husband to take care of this loneliness, husbands might find it as too much love.

3. Emotional Anchor - In any marriage the most important part is healthy communication. Being at different intellectual planes can increase the emotional instability.

4. Sex - angel or devil - I have found that upto 75% men and women getting married have no idea what sex is.
no one teaches them what is sex, what is its importance, how to perform and what to expect out of it.

Most find it as a recreational activity.
While men base their ideas about sex on the fantasy world pornography teaches them. Women rely on the hyped up experience of their friend.
While men idiotically think that having a 30min intercourse is what is normal, women feel that its just a way to satisfy their husband.

Sex without ego and full of positive emotions can be the greatest binding force. It could be the greatest form of non-verbal communication that two individuals can share.

Sex isn't an act of the devil.. but an act made by god for spreading love.

5. Guilt or Self-Blame - I have found so many people who within the 1st year of marriage tell me "I was better off not married, but what to do now?"

the moment you have guilt, sadness or self-blame coming into you, remember you are creating base for a troubled future.

If things aren't as you expected then accept the change. If you cannot accept the change, than consult a professional to find out why are you so rigid.

6. What is the perfect conduct in marriage? -
Nobody is prepared for marriage. Marriage is a journey where you learn with every day.
If you are not ready to learn and accept the teachings, then nothing can help you from falling trap to depression.

While many men battle is it right to favor their mother or their wife.
Many wife battle is it right to answer back to their mother-in-law or keep quiet.
Ego is many times confused for self-respect and a battle of ego's churns all.

THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND-
Many individuals are deeply affected by the above changes. This leads 3 or more of the following-
a. feeling sad through out the day
b. restlessness - mind is always occupied with thoughts.
c. running away from home and preferring to stay out
d. anger/irritation
e. crying episodes
f. calling parents through out the day and complaining
g. constant want to change situation
h. talking of separation.
i. decreased sexual needs.

such people need to consult a counselor/psychiatrist as their mind is going into a stress cycle that will only increase when family/friends try to counsel them.

if such a stress cycle is left untreated it eventually turns into chronic depression, which changes the brain shape and leads to complications in the future.
falsh-backs, constant complaining, irritation, anger, excessive spending, family fights are all later manifestations of the same.

for any further help email me at eksoch@gmail.com

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com
website - www.mindmantra.in

when will we start to see the beauty inside the heart


"FROM BEAUTY TO BEAST" - This is the comment that someone had posted to his photo on Facebook... For a second I felt really sad.

I thought, how sad is the society, in whic we live in. More often than not physical appearance defines females.  The guy who posted that comment never thought that today Ashwariya Rai is a Mother, one of the most beautiful feelings in the world, and one that only women are blessed to experience.

As I read further, I found there were many men who had posted similar comments or liked that comment.

Ironically, a few hours later I was visited by 2 girls who suffered from "inferiority complex" arising from this "cheap" male mentality that affect the society like a disease.

Girl no.1 - Varsha (not real name)

She was 25yr old, very educated, middle-class girl. She came with extremely high stress and restlessness. Her issue, she was dark and slightly on the healthier side. This was reason enough for hundreds of marriage proposal rejections.
After I analyzed her personality, I told her, you are very gifted. The guy who marries you will be extremely lucky, because you have an amazing adjusting personality, that can drive any marriage to extreme happiness.
It was true, and I hoped some guy would soon see beyond her looks and relieve her of the pain.


Girl no.2 - Rekha (not real name)
A 42yr old, very graceful, middle-high class lady. I thank god for every person I get to meet as they teach me a lot. But meeting Rekhaji was amazing. A happy-go-lucky jolly woman, who could counsel even the worst of suicidal people...but sadly couldnt find a solution for herself. She was an extremely beautiful punjabi girl when she got married. After 15yrs, 2kids, and gaining 15kgs, her husband appreciated the sacrifices and great mother/wife she was. But at the same time, couldn't resist from
seeking "sexual pleasures" outside wedlock because his wife didn't have the same attractive power.. and same sexual activity as before.
A woman who laughed through most of the session, who had one of the most positive aura's I have come across, broke down on her helplessness... broke down on the feeling of worthlessness... All these years of sacrifice and love seemed immaterial, in front of that one sentence her husband said.
She is a very strong lady, and has the will-power to even seek separation... but that doesnt' discount the sadness she is gone through.


Its so ironic that most men chose their girl-friends and wifes based on beauty. when beauty wont last... The most beautiful woman in the world has proved it..

"THE ONLY LASTING BEAUTY IS THE ONE IN YOUR HEART" - always search for it, as its blissful.

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com

SUICIDAL FEELINGS/THOUGHTS

A great majority of people experience suicidal thoughts/feelings at least once in their life.
Based on true cases, here is a brief over-view on this very important topic:

Why does one feel suicidal?
Many kinds of emotional pain can lead to thoughts of suicide. The reasons for this pain are unique to each one of us, and our ability to cope with the pain differs from person to person.

Don't listen to anyone who tells you, "That's not enough to be suicidal about." We are all different. What might be bearable to one person may not be bearable to you.

There are, however, some common factors that may lead us to experience suicidal thoughts and feelings.

1. Most common cause of feeling suicidal is due to the presence of medical problems that can be treated depression, anxiety disorders, stress, medical conditions that cause constant pain, cancer, drug and alcohol dependency.

2. Second most common cause is the presence of environmental factors that need exterior solution, like financial, legal or school problems, grief or loss of a loved one, and other life difficulties can all create profound emotional distress.

Once triggered emotional pain due to anyone of the above causes changes in the brain functioning. This causes a decreased ability to solve problems and decreased "positive chemicals/hormones".

Once you are unable to think about solutions and the futures "seems" sad, extreme steps are thought of.

The emotional pain required to trigger such a thoughts in one individual differ from other. So never compare yourself to others.

A suicidal thought is always an EMERGENCY.. never take it lightly. What to Do?
1. REACH OUT FOR HELP - TALK to family, friends.. If they don't help, then pay someone to listen to you, understand your pain and not judge you. Counselors, psychologist and psychiatrists are there for that.

If even that fails, call the various suicide helpliness and talk it out.

YOUR LIFE IS VERY VALUABLE....EVERY SINGLE LIFE IS... DON'T LET IT GO WASTE.

One thing I have observed is that even when you decide to talk to either someone you trust or someone neutral/professional admitting your suicidal thoughts to another person can be difficult. Thats why chosing someone who doesn't judge you is essential.

Don't feel bad, tell them what exactly is going in your mind. What is your plan.
read it.

What if you don't feel understood?
If you do not feel the person you have chosen to talk to has understood, tell someone else, or call a suicide crisis helpline.

There are plenty of people out there who will understand. Don’t let one bad experience stop you from finding someone who can help.

2. Ways to cope with suicidal thoughts and feelings
a. Talk with someone every day/ weel, preferably face to face. - Though you feel like withdrawing and being alone, take the effort, ask your trusted friends/acquaintances to spend sometime listening to you.
If you don't have friends/family to do so, there are professionals ready to help you.

b. Make a safety plan. Always carry the contact numbers for your friends and family members who will help in an emergency.

c. Plan your life - Make a schedule for yourself every day and stick to it, no matter what. Keep a regular routine as much as possible, even when your feelings seem out of control.

d. Get out of your comfort zone. At least 30 minutes a day.

e. Exercise at least 30minutes a day.

f. Make time for things that bring you joy. Even if very few things bring you pleasure at the moment, force yourself to do the things you used to enjoy.
even eating a chocolate cake can bring pleasure, so do every such activity.

g. Consult a professional psychiatrist - New age medications given for a few weeks, without any side-effects, no drowyness and no addiction potential can help you come back to life soon then thought.

3. Things You should avoid when having suicidal thoughts:
a. Being alone. Solitude can make suicidal thoughts even worse.
Visit a friend, or family member. If you have no one log onto the internet and just do something or chat with someone.

b. Alcohol and drugs. Drugs and alcohol increase depression, hamper your problem-solving ability, and can make you act impulsively.
Its a popular myth that alcohol helps to cure depression, instead it causes more harm to your psyche than you can think.

c. Avoid things that will make you feel worse. - Listening to sad music, looking at certain photographs, reading old letters, or visiting places you spent with a loved one can all increase negative feelings.


For any further help on this topic email me,
Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com
website - www.mindmantra.in