Teachers are no longer God - They are human Beings!!!

"A 6yr old Girl in upscale #school of #Bangalore #raped by her skating instructor.!"

"A 3yr old brutally kicked, punched and beaten up by her tutor, in upscale #Salt #Lake area of #Kolkatta"

"A basketball instructor who sent obscene online messages to his female students"


#India is a country which has always considered Teachers to God.
Unfortunately in todays world that is just an age old myth, which prompts society and parents to blindly trusting and believing that teachers are pious and holy people.

The reality of life is that we live in a world dominated by money, desires and power.
Teaching is one of the lucrative avenues to attain these.
Teachers are Human Beings... and schools are doing a lucrative business where they don't always check the Teachers they employees.

As a #psychiatrist I have meet hundreds of children who have suffered at the hands of teachers.

Why teachers do it?
1. Teachers are human beings - they suffer from clinical depression, anger issues, anxiety, stress, obsessive compulsiveness and psychotic thoughts.
NO SCHOOL does a regular psychological profiling of their teachers.
They are just appointed based on certificates or recommendations.

2. Teachers carry their family troubles at work - irritations and angers of family tensions are taken out on children.

3. Teachers live under the delusion they know everything. And are superior. This makes them believe they can abuse children.

4. The great majority of Teachers have no knowledge of child psychology and forget they know anything about child psychiatry.
They do some stupid 2-3day training which gives them a delusional belief of knowing what child psychology is.
I have seen idiotic teachers verbally abusing children with Learning disorders and they go on recording suggesting "abuse" as the only corrective measure present for such student.

5. Teachers tend to discriminate between children, based on parents profile or child marks. This makes them angry and spiteful against other students.

How does it affect the child?
I have met hundreds of children suffering from the abuse and atrocities of their teachers -
1. A child can develop severe clinical depression, which will decrease his brain performance for life time.
2. Child becomes fearful. The fear eventually will hamper his performance in life at later stages.
3. Child bed wets, doesn't eat properly, doesn't sleep well, shows unwanted anger, fights with siblings/friends, has uncontrollable mood swings - because he/she needs to vent out the frustration of being abused by the teacher.
4. Words spoken in anger or beatings given can create a post-traumatic distress in the childs mind, which will eventually mark his/her for life.
5. Child might develop memory and concentration problems because of fear of teachers behavior.
6. Child might become introvert because of the teachers abuse.
7. Sexual abuse or even obscene comments or sex-texting - are behaviors which can change the psyche of a child for ever.

What needs to be done by the School?
1. De-sensitize the teachers - Remove the "god" concept from their mind. Make them understand they are service providers and accountable for each action.

2. There should be CCTV camera monitoring of the classes and the behavior of the teachers should be monthly assessed.

3. Psychological profiling should be done for each teacher and available online for parents to have a transparency.

4. Have psychiatric workshops - where teachers are taught that Punishment like beating or abusing.. are inhuman and destroy the mind of a child.
A teacher has to be sensitised to avoid such behavior in any case.

5. In case of weak student or ADHD students, teachers should consult psychologists and read/learn about any Learning disorder the child is suffering from.

6. Immediate police complain and strict action should be taken against any teacher found showing physically abusive or sexually provocative behavior towards a child.

What Parents need to do?
1. Listen to the child - they don't always lie. They know what they are suffering from.
2. analyse the behavior of a child - there is always a reason for why he/she is behaving in a different fashion. Its not just "age related naughtiness"

3. Always keep a channel open with the child - if you cannot talk to him, tell the child to draw, email or sms you his problem.
Listen to the problem.. and don't be judgemental.

4. if a teacher is found guilty Don't try to cover up everything. - LET GO attitude only makes you a weak, impotent parent in the mind of your child.
And it will come out later in life as abusive behavior towards you.

Lead by example - Make sure a complaint is done with the school management.
And Also a police complaint is done.
Such teachers should be jailed and punished.. else you cannot setup an example to follow righteousness for your child and society.


written by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)
email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in
twitter- @sai_ki_artist
(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

Clinic Address - Mind Mantra, 15,
shreeji plaza,
plot-24, sector-25,
opposite seawoods station,
#Seawoods (east), Navi Mumbai, #Thane, #Mumbai

Sexual Perversions - What triggers a child to be raped!!!

If people where to psychologically profile into Child rapes, Spouse killings or even acid attack victims.. you will find the oppressor to be mentally sick for a long time before the act was committed. Sadly in all that time no action was taken.

One of the darkest areas of Human Psychiatry, is the zone of Sexual Perversions.

By definition - A Sexual perversions is a mental health illness in which sexual excitement or orgasm is obtained by thoughts, urges or acts that are considered unnatural or immoral to cultural norms.
These thoughts, urges or behaviors produce severe mental distress which eventually result in severe financial loss, social rejection and legal complications.

The most common sexual perversions -
1. Impulse to publicly expose once genitals to member of opposite sex.
2. Excitement through use of non-living objects. - the most common involves getting excited by touching or smelling used undergarments or clothes.
3. A common one seen specially in crowded places is - Touching and rubbing genitalia against a non-consenting person.
4. One of the most dangerous is having sexual fantasies/act with young children. - this perversion is the one responsible for childhood sexual abuse and rape of children.
5. One of the most common undercover sexual perversions in marriages involves the act of giving humiliation, suffering, hurting and/or physical pain to the partner before or during sexual act.

6. Another common one is that of sexual fantasies or sexual act with family member.
7. A less common one is cross-dressing
8. The most common in the world is getting sexually aroused by watching others undressing or indulge in sexual activity.

Cause -
psychologically its attributed to lack of complete sexual maturity.
biologically its attributed to mental illness arising from hyperactive, obsessive compulsive brain structure.

The sequence of Events in the brain -
An event, person or image triggers an impulse to indulge in a perversive sexual act. Till a person doesn't indulge in the act, his/her mind is continuously craving more and more for that act.
The intellect completely blinds up, and its only after indulgence in the act that one feels happy and realizes what has been done.
In a few cases there might be extreme sorrow or guilt for what was done.
But next the same sequence is followed next time the impulse is triggered.

Its present in both men and women.

Treatment -
Sexual Perversions are mental illness. They require treatment.
1. Medicines to help decrease the altered impulse
2. Medicines to help decrease the anger and aggression related to the impulse.
3. Counselling to help one understand his/her sexual maturity.

Sad Reality  -
The majority of sexual perversions are never treated.
As a psychiatrist I meet many victims of sexual perversions, they are ready to quietly take the pain but don't bring the oppressor to justice or take him for treatment.

Specially in Indian society Males with sexual perversions are shielded by their mothers or wifes. There is denial to accept this mental illness and a complete denial to seek treatment.

I have treated hundreds of woman/men who are suffering depression because of the physically torture they have to undergo before or during sexual act by their spouse, but they decide to keep quiet and never bring their spouse to treatment.

I have met children who have been inappropriately touched or sexually abused by male relatives/teachers.. but parents/family want the child to be treated without legally or medically fighting the oppressor.


A sexual Pervert might know he has a problem.. But will never seek help... its important to take him to the right professional.

written by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)

email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in
twitter- @sai_ki_artist
(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

Clinic Address - Mind Mantra, 15,
shreeji plaza,
plot-24, sector-25,
opposite seawoods station,
Seawoods (east), Navi Mumbai, Thane, Mumbai 

The Drama Queen

In the field of personality analysis in human psychology, one of the most interesting types is that of "drama queen's"

Its a good mixture of simple and complex thought process.

The major pillar of the personality is - attention seeking.
And a "Drama Queen" will go to any extent to get attention.

A "Drama Queen" personality can be present in both males and females.. In this article I will refer to the feminine side of it.

When you Mind-read a Drama Queen, you find out -

1. She craves for attention so much that even a few minutes or hours without it, makes her irritable and uncomfortable.

2. She loves extremes - you never know when she will drift from happiness to anger ... caring to hate.. It happens within minutes and could be small simple things that cause it.

3. Physical appearances matter a lot. - she would wear clothes that don't suit her or expose too much.. just to show-off and be talked about.

4. Excessive amount of criticism for others, their dressing sense and the way they talk.

5. High amount of theatrics - false image creation - exaggerating an situation, creating gossips or telling lies.

6. Unnecessary importance and value to relationships or interactions where she gets importance and attention.
And extreme criticism, exaggerated anger to even close relationships if not given attention.

7. High expenditure on luxury items, just meant to show off and not actually of any personal need.
Many a times, the expenditure is way beyond one's affordability level.

In Clinical Psychiatric Terms, attention seeking becomes a major cause for sadness and restlessness, when the need for attention causes problems in behavior, emotion, relationships and work.

The Treatment normally revolves around a 4 point approach-
1. De-addiction from the need for attention - this can happen through indulgence in social work and trying to give unconditional love to the under-privileged.

2. professional counselling to help one control on the irritation, anger and mood swings coming from high need of attention seeking.

3. Medications by a psychiatrist to help control the mood swings and self-harming behaviors like excessive talking, excessive spending and depression.

4. Family/friends therapy - where they get educated on how to handle such a person.

written by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)

email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in
twitter- @sai_ki_artist
(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

Clinic Address – Mind Mantra, 15,
shreeji plaza,
plot-24, sector-25,
opposite seawoods station,
Seawoods (east), Navi Mumbai, Mumbai

Myths Regarding Mental illness

1. Once a person gets a mental health illness he/she is useless for life.

Truth - There is a 100% cure if a person is treated in time.

2. The medicines for mental illness are sleeping pills and once started have to be taken life long.

Truth - Medicines and treatments have evolved since the 1970's. No longer sleeping pills are the 1st stage of treatment.

3. People with mental illnesses are aggressive or violent.

Truth - Its only in the higher stages of a mental health illness that a patient shows polarized behavioral pattern. Either they are violent or they are completely aloof from the world.

The great majority of people who suffer from mental health illness, don't reach this stages and are fighting the psychological and emotional issues.

4. If you are positive, eat well and sleep well, you won't be affected by Mental illness.

Truth - thats not completely true. Mental health illness can affect even the most organised minds. Its dependent on -
a. genetic strength one person possess.
b. reaction to a particular stress.
c. personality.

5. A person seeking treatment for mental health illness is "mentally weak".

Truth - Some of the most brilliant minds in the world have suffered from mental health illness. Beethoven,Winston Churchill, Kurt cobain, Van gogh, Jim Carey, Princess Diana, Charles dickens, Dilip Kumar, Dharmendra are all known to have battled some form of mental health illness.

6. Mental health illness is madness.

Truth - Wrong, mental health illness is an psychological, emotional and behavioral reaction to the stress around you. It can range from depression to schizophrenia.
Off all the hundreds of disorders under mental health illness, only one or two can be classified as "madness".

7. Once you have suffered Mental health illness, you cannot work again.

Truth - People who have recovered from mental health illness, with proper encouragement and environment tend to give much better performance.
Since they have seen the negative side of things, they tend to be more capable of fighting things.

8. Medicines are not safe and a waste of time.

Truth - Not everyone requires medicines.
Not everyone needs to take medicines for life.

If you consult a good psychiatrist in time, even counselling can help you over-come the issues.

9. Children don't experience mental illnesses.

Truth - studies show that 20% of the world wide depression happen in children below 15.
ADHD, autism, learning disorders, behavioral disorders, opposing parents authority, violence... are present in a lot of children.
Sadly parents and teachers don't look into it with logical view point and are blinded by myths.

10. Psychiatric disorders are not true illnesses like heart disease or cancer; people who have a mental illness are faking it.

Truth - Mental health disorders seem invisible because there are no tests to show their presence in the brain.
Recently PET scans have been used to show patients the difference in brain activities during normal state and psychiatric illness state.
One can search the internet and take a look at those PET scans.

PET Scans are expensive ranging upto 30 thousand rupees per scan. Hence getting such tests done isn't feasible for most patients.

Mental health illness are very much like a broken bone or a gastric problem. There is a microscopic physical hurt in the brain, that leads to change in chemical production.


written by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)

email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in
twitter- @sai_ki_artist
(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

Clinic Address - Mind Mantra, 15,
shreeji plaza,
plot-24, sector-25,
opposite seawoods station,
Seawoods (east), Navi Mumbai, Thane, Mumbai

are your "work friends" your true friends?

Full-time work for me means 40-50 hours per week in the office with my coworkers. I spend 9-plus hours a day with them, and if I’m lucky, maybe 6 waking hours with my husband – less if you consider how much of that husband-time is spent checking email or responding to work matters from the couch at night when I'm supposed to be sharing quality time. It’s even less time with my children because they go to bed much earlier.

So I’ve been giving a lot of thought to the question of whether or not it’s beneficial to be friends with your coworkers. And by the same token, are coworkers actually friends, or just being “friendly?”

I took the question to my social-media outlets, where I appealed to others for their opinions about friendships in the workplace. Here are some of the answers I received.

“I believe a friendly relationship with your coworkers is very important for the strength of the team. However, if you become too close of friends, I can see how it could hurt the business in some ways. You begin to make emotional decisions at times instead of strict business decisions.”

“I think it’s a double-edged sword. You have to be careful. You don’t want the workplace to be cliquey, but it does create a nice environment when you’re friends with your coworkers…There are days when I wish everyone could just be friends and get along, and then there are days where I wish everyone just kept to themselves and did their jobs.”

“I think it’s a double-edged sword. It makes work enjoyable when you're friends, but sometimes work doesn’t get done. And if you’re in a place of authority over a ‘friend’, it’s a fine line.”

I think the question that resounds is whether, after a long day at work, would you want to see your coworker outside of the work environment, or would you rather go home to the friends you have outside of work? That appears to be the difference in having real friends at work, versus having work friends.

Size Matters

In my opinion, the size company you work for also plays a huge role in the type of friendships formed within a company. I’ve worked for both mid-sized and small-sized companies, and in both settings I've found people I can truly call my friends.

In fact, the maid-of-honor at my wedding was first my coworker and then my roommate and best friend. After leaving that mid-size company, I still regularly keep in touch with at least three of the ladies that I became friends with while there, and we're now enjoying new jobs, marriages, babies and life outside of that work setting.

It doesn’t always stay that way, though. I've had people I considered to be a “friend” while they were working in the office with me. One of them, as an example, left and never contacted me again. It only took a few failed attempts to connect to realize that she was a work-friend and not a true friend.

The feedback I've received from my social media outlets, however, paints a very different picture of friendships in the cutthroat, large enterprise world of business.

“You tend to run into more people that will screw you before they befriend you, and are really two-faced. Especially as you get into bigger and bigger employers.”

I actually had a friend who worked for a large agency tell me that working for a huge enterprise company was like selling your soul. You can’t make friends, because nobody's your friend. Everyone's out for himself and a friendly smile given one day will not keep you from getting stabbed in the back the next.

Friendship is Healthy

Overall, however, I think that developing friendships in the office is good for you and for your employer. It creates a sense of camaraderie and comfort.

I've worked in an environment where I didn't consider anyone else to be my friend, and my tenure didn't last long. Not only was the environment volatile, I couldn’t even lean on a support system around me to get through my days. I actually started making myself physically sick on the drive to work in the morning.

Remember, the key to developing work friendships is the same as developing personal friendships. Allow the friendship to develop naturally and organically. Given the fact that so much of our time is spent with our coworkers, it’s a natural development to recognize those folks you want to legitimately become friends with versus those with whom it's better to just remain friendly.

Tips for Workplace Friendships

When you do become friends with the people in your workplace, there are a few tips to keep the friendships healthy. While you can share details about your weekend, your children or your hobbies, there’s a list of things that you should still keep to yourself:
Money-related conversations: Keep your salary and your financial history to yourself.
Job-related details: Don't discuss performance issues, recent reviews, raises, bonuses, etc.
Intimate details: Don’t share your sexual history, or that you're hung over from a night of drinking.

Pros of Workplace Friendships

I may not share the opinion of the masses, but I'd prefer to be friends with the folks I work with for many reasons.

1. They often see you at your worst. Let’s face it, as hard as we try, it’s near impossible to keep work life and personal life separate. My colleagues have helped me through many difficult times with words of comfort, advice and thoughtful gestures. Just recently I lost my father to a severe illness, and I don’t think I could have gotten through the days and months preceding and following his death without my coworkers by my side.

2. They celebrate your birthday and anniversary. Come on, even family will push off celebrating your birthday until the weekend. Your coworkers will make a cake, take you to lunch or even drinks on your actual birthday.

3. They share a common sense of purpose. Everyone's working for the same company and overall, has the same goal – to make yourself, and in return the company more profitable. Plus, they make it worth getting out of bed on a snowy day and making the trek into work. Someone has likely already made a pot of coffee.

4. Friendly promotes creativity. When it’s easy to talk to your coworkers and you can relate on many different levels, you can be more comfortable thinking outside of the proverbial box and coming up with new, profitable ideas.

Cons of Workplace Friendships

There can be a downside to making friends in the workplace too. Sharing too much personal information can be a downside. Here are some others.

1. Work can become unprofessional. It’s important to remember that you're still in a professional setting, and as an experienced employee, keep the amount of water cooler chitchat to a minimum.

2. Backstabbing can happen. While you don’t like to admit it, the person you call a friend may wind up stabbing you in the back. It’s the nature of a work environment. You can be friends with those around you, just don’t get too surprised if one day that same person tried to sabotage you.

3. Lack of work-life balance. The lines may wind up blurred as to where work ends and outside life begins. I'd say if you and your coworker can have a conversation for 15 minutes and not bring up work, then you're likely in a place where you have more in common than work and can thus distinguish work and social lines.

I’m curious: I’m a friendly person by nature and I like to surround myself with positive people. Do you share my views about workplace friendships or do you disagree?

(taken from linkedin)

Networking Disasters - How to Market yourself effectively


Networking is a slow and patient activity, like gardening. When you network, you plant seeds, and over time you water them and give them sun. You're cultivating relationships and learning about people and their perspectives.

Networking is a personal growth activity and a way to give back.

If you're focused on the win you have in mind -- a prized introduction, a resume walked into HR on your behalf or some free website design, for instance - then you're not really networking.

You're creating a social space and social energy, in a coffee shop for instance, in order to justify your request for a business service or good. That is impolite, and it isn't networking.

When you invite people to coffee to get them to buy from you, hire you or make an introduction for you, you're turning a relationship-building activity into a transaction, and that is wrong.

You're not paying the person who is so kindly lending you time and attention, so unless the two of you have agreed otherwise, the only topic you can properly introduce at at one-on-one networking date that you suggested is "Tell me about yourself!"

Be happy for the networking time and any advice that you are offered. Don't push people to extend themselves for you when you have little or no social capital invested with them.


A woman came up to me after a conference and asked "What am I doing wrong in my job-search networking?" "What are you doing right now?" I asked her.

"Well," she said, "My friends introduce me to people they know, and I ask them to coffee and I go to coffee with them.

At the coffee meeting, I pull out my resume and walk through it job by job, and ask them if they have any questions. Then at the end I ask them who else I should talk to in their company, and ask for an introduction to that person."

I started hyperventilating just listening to the job-hunter's story.On the flight home I wondered how those noble people sat through a forcible "walk through my resume" coffee date without running screaming into the parking lot. The woman with the resume doesn't realize she's throwing her friends under the bus -- the friends who made the introductions that sentencedtheir friends to those painful all-about-my-resume coffee dates.

When someone introduces you to a friend, go to the meeting without your resume. Sit and ask questions. "How long have you lived in town?" "Tell me your career story!" Keep this rule top of mind: it's okay to ask people for their advice on slight association; it's never okay to ask for introductions before you're invited to.


Wherever Dante stopped digging the rungs of hell, there is yet a lower one for people who use your name irresponsibly to swipe an introduction they didn't ask you for. It's happened to me a few times.

A sort-of-friend found out about a guy I know who was doing a lot of investing a/k/a had a lot of money, and the sort-of-friend wrote to the guy and tried to sell him Florida beachfront property, using my name as the connective tissue between her and the guy (and extrapolating his email address, which I hadn't given her).

I heard about the beachfront-property pitch and expressed my displeasure. The lady didn't understand what she had done wrong. "You're his friend, I used your name, so what?" she said. "I don't need your permission to use your name when I write to a guy."

The woman is mistaken. An introduction is offered or it's not. Don't drop names of friends who haven't blessed the use of their names as door-openers.


A fundamental misconception about networking is that it's appropriate to call or write to perfect strangers and ask them to do things for you -- to pass your resume on to the head of HR, for instance.

Some poor guy is sitting at his desk and the phone rings. "Hi, is this Abishek?" a voice says. "Yes," you say, mind racing as you try to imagine who it could be. "Yeah, I found you on LinkedIn, and I'm looking for a job in your company," says the voice. "Will you open some doors for me?"

That's not networking. That's another abuse of the social frame for commercial purposes. Talk to your friends instead, and see who they know. Go to networking events. Try the stuff I teach, Pain Letters and Human-Voiced Resumes. Step out there. Don't call people you don't know and ask them to go out of their way for you.

It wouldn't be good judgment on their part if they did. What does "vouch for" mean, anyway? It means that you can speak for someone. How can a stranger speak for you?


Each person is valuable as an individual. The worst thing a networker can do is to treat another person like a conduit, a pass-through or a means to an end. It feels bad when people do that to you.

When I first landed in Colorado in 2001 I had got some networking invitations. A woman was breathless to meet me. "I'm so excited to meet you!" she gushed. We met for coffee.

"I want to tell you everything about myself!" she said, an inauspicious start.

"Then, if we have time, I want to learn what you do for a living."

You know that thing where your spit catches in your throat and it makes you cough? I coughed so hard I almost flew out of my chair.

"I'm trying to piece this together," I said. "You wanted to meet me very badly, but you don't know what I do for a living? Help me understand how this meeting came to be."

"Oh," she said, "about fifty different people told me that you know a ton of people. You could make introductions for my business.That's why I was excited to meet you!"

That's the kind of networking I want you to avoid, the kind where you value people based on the size of their networks.

What matters in networking and in the workplace is energy. If the energy between you and another person is good energy, you might become friends. That's when the concrete stuff - introductions, job leads and favors - will come in. Don't rush the transaction.

The power of the relationship, the communitrons that flow between you and your friend and the mojo boost for both of you, when you can see those things, are the real prize.


#Monsoon Related #Depression Hits #Mumbai HARD

Over the last few days my clinic has been flooded with patients who have suddenly developed clinical levels depression within the last 2 weeks.

How is it possible, that a perfectly #normal person is suddenly hit by lows that destroy his #confidence and decreases his levels of happiness?

The answer lies in the #weather... Its the #monsoon thats causing it.

How does the Monsoon cause depression?
In psychiatric medicine its called Seasonal Affective Disorder. Clinical research has found the causes of the same to be -
a. Decrease in sunlight of decreases production of brain activating chemicals.

b. Decrease in Body Temperature – leads the body into “conservation mode”. Body heat is automatically maintained by shutting down some essential brain and body processes.

c. Genetic – In case of a family member having had clinical depression or committing suicide, there is a possibility of a "dormant gene" being activated by the monsoon.

What are the symptoms?
8 or more of the following symptoms -

1. Unexplained Sadness present for most part of the day
2. lack of interest in doing any pleasurable activity - a person starts avoiding activities like going out with friends, spending time with partner or even the need for sex.
3. Increase in appetite, which one knows is not normal but cannot control the same.
4. Feeling extremely lethargic and no energy to perform otherwise simple tasks.
5. Inability to concentrate leading to memory and attention problems.
6. Prominent negative thinking.
7. Easily irritable and angry. Even minor situations cause extreme anger.
8. Avoiding work and daily activities.
9. Social withdrawal – loss of interest in meeting people, friends and family. Wanting to stay aloof.
10. Unexplained feeling of unhappiness, and feeling others cannot help.
11. Increased sleep and increased time in bed just lying without doing any activity.
12. Escapism - higher indulgence in smoking, drinking, cannabis or other drugs.
13. Criticising and negative approach towards your life. Wanting to run away from the same.
14. Ideas of Suicide or self-harm in some form of other.

How can it be treated?
a. Light therapy - have well lit up rooms and in severe cases UV lamps might be used.
b. Adequate diet plan - diet should include more proteins and less of fat/sugar/fried food.
Avoid junk food as much as possible.
c. Consult a psychiatrist. - Medications to regulate mood swings, sleep disturbance.
d. Exercise schedule according to body type to trigger alertness.

written by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)
email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in
twitter- @sai_ki_artist
(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

Clinic Address - Mind Mantra, 15,
shreeji plaza,
plot-24, sector-25,
opposite seawoods station,
Seawoods (east), Navi Mumbai, Thane, Mumbai

Sexual Abuse

Sexual abuse is one of the most traumatic experiences a person can go through.

Its not just a physical hurt, but a violation and destruction of your psychological self that leads to the highest levels of sadness, anger and fear.

As a psychiatrist every time I meet a victim of sexual abuse, it really gives me a lot of pain.

A few points about Sexual abuse or molestation -

1. The aggressor in a great majority of cases is known to the victim - family member, friend, co-worker or employee.

2. The aggressor creates a "FALSE" concept of FEAR in the mind of the victim.

3. The aggressor in most cases is very fearful of the victim telling or complaining about the act.. so tries to create a "GOOD saint like" image of himself in front of other.

4. The crime of Sexual Abuse/molestation will not be erased from memory with time.
The memory will remain fresh in the memory.
Its only through Psychiatric Treatment that the victim can be helped him/her to cope up with the traumatic memory.

5. Anger, bitterness and resentment is natural to be present.- This anger, bitterness and resentment can become very self-destructive and lead to thoughts of self-harm, cutting one-self, attempts of suicide.
One has to help the victim accept this anger, bitterness and resentment... but not direct it against herself.

6. Forgiveness is a natural act, it cannot be pushed.- In great majority of cases its impossible for the victim to develop forgiveness.
In such cases its very wrong of the parents/care-givers/friends to force him/her to develop forgiveness.
Forgiveness only comes after one again develops self-love.

7. There is no answer for the question "why did this happen to me?"
Family members many times argue, point out, criticise or philosophise about it.. but in reality there is no answer to it.

8. The only person to be blamed for the entire episode is the aggressor. One should never blame the victim for the same.

9. Essential to take actions against the aggressor. This will help decrease the anger against self, and promote generation of self-love.

10. The best way out of after effects of sexual abuse is by meeting and helping victims of the same. This way, one creates an identity and slowly they can motivate each other to achieve better heights in life.

written by -
Dr.Hemant Mittal
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)
email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in
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Soul-Mate vs Life-Partner

Soul-Mate Vs Life-Partner

In life everyone yearns for love. A true lover automatically becomes a soul-mate.
Lets check the differences between a soul-mate and a life-partner.

Soul Mate vs Life Partner -

1. A soul-mate is always in your heart.
He/she might be alive or dead, near or away, married to someone else... But there is a feeling of awareness in your heart, you can feel him/her there.

Life-partner needs to be alive, near you, in a relationship/married to you.

2. Spiritual connect - You don't need memories to remember a soul mate. You don't even need to remember him/her again and again.
Every moment you meet him/her, it starts from where you left.

A life-partner is based on a balance of memories created with him/her. If the memories are positive, the life-partner would seem more lovable and vice-versa.

3. There is no place for judgement. A soul-mate makes you fall in love with you flaws. You are willing to change your entire thought process from him/her. You are even ready to break away from all rules and regulations.

A life-partner is based on regulations and expectations. Judgement is essential part of the relationship.

4. With a soul-mate a fight is an act of Love - You patch up without any grudges. You forget the fight the moment you patch up. You don't feel hurt, there is no ego, No need to prove who is superior.

With a life-partner a fight is a battle of egos. You are extremely concerned about your expectations. Grudges are kept in the mind.
There is need to prove who is superior.

5. Soul-mates don't care about the "rules and regulations of the society".

Life-partner is based on the rules and regulations of the society.

6. Soul mates are ready to sacrifice. They care for each other more than themselves. They might keep their pain/problems in their heart, but will always be ready to cure the pain of the other.

Life-Partners are more selfish. They dont sacrifice without something in return.

7. Soul-mates love never dies. No matter how much they hurt each other, fight or move away in life... they will eventually reconnect at some point and connect at different planes of love. Their love is more spiritual than physical.

Life-Partners are more human. They have conditional love. Love that can fade away with even with time. Love is covered by possessiveness, expectations, memories and ego. Once they part ways, they might never reconnect with each other.

Remember No relationship choice is wrong till its in accordance with your personality.
You might be a spiritually high personality and require a soul-mate.
You might be a personality based in practicality and require a life-partner.
The choice is yours.

written by -
Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS,DPM)
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer/speaker and Counselor)
email – eksoch@gmail.com