Mind Mantra: January 2012

Why Friends turn into Enemies?

The gossip lines where running hot yesterday in Mumbai. The "Badshah" of Bollywood had lost his "shanti" to slap a certain Mr.Farah Khan a.k.a Shirish Kunder and everyone seemed to have an inside "scoop" on what really happened.

It was around 7pm, when a friend of mine texted me about the on-going mayhem within entertainment circles. Oblivious of the world, I was as usual totally engrossed in helping my consulting patients. The news took me aback for a second. After all Shah Rukh Khan is known for his ability to play the card of diplomacy, perfectly. Acts of physical aggression are the copyright of another Khan.

By late evening, I had many versions. Some of them really absurd and some of them very realistic. But as I read and heard what my friends in the Social Media where posting, what really became clear to me is that this was a clear cut case of "friends turning into enemies". It immediately triggered my brain to think about the millions of people out there who have suffered a similar type of situation. Everyone at colleges, offices, hospitals, societies, army, organisations, etc have had that one or two "great friend" that over the years has become a "thorn".

So why do "friends turn into enemies"?

1. Conditional Love - When a friendship is based on conditions, the friendship automatically acquires an expiry period. SRK and Shirish Kunder where great friends till they shared a win-win situation. When friendship is based on some kind of social, financial or professional "benefit" from the other, the equations change as soon as the "benefits" disappear.

2. The Chanakya Effect - Chanakya said that true friendship only blossoms when its between equals. He still holds true today. When a friend becomes more successful than the other, comparison starts to set in. Comparison is an invisible enemy of friendship. It starts in the mind, and slowly changes the personal perception about a friend.

Comparison triggers excessive analysis of every single detail in a relationship. From the deficiencies, to situations where a friend has helped or not helped, everything takes a negative shade.

3. Three is crowd - Friendship is bond of love and respect that two people share. When this bond is one based on conditional love, a third person can very well influence it. Such influences are many times done at purpose to showcase one's "psychological power".

Salman isn't in good terms with SRK. Shirish is not a successful film-maker. Salman can easily influence Shirish and inflate his ego.

4. Ego Battles - Everyone has an ego. He/she who denies it is just fooling himself/herself. Friendship is a bond that many times requires ego sacrifice. Unfortunately ego is like an elastic rubber-band. It can only be stretched to a certain extent, post that it recoils with full force.

Shirish ego was hurt when SRK refused to do his movie. SRK's ego was hurt when Shirish tweeted against his movie. It was just a matter of time, before two highly egoistic people got aggressive and violent to prove their "ego supremacy"

5. Communication Breakdown - when people stop talking to each other openly, misunderstanding start growing. Misunderstanding slowly become mistrust. This slowly destroys a the bond of love. Effective Communication is essential for survival of a good friendship.

If Shirish Kunder had told SRK how upset he was for not doing his film, SRK should have found ways to ease out the pain of his then friend.

Friendship is a beautiful bond that requires a lot of work. Friendships are a gift from god. Friendships are also as fragile as a mirror, once broken they cannot be repaired.

Love and Be Loved...

For any further discussion on the above feel free to contact me at the following-

Dr.hemant Mittal
Neuro-Emotional and Sexual Health Medical Consultant, Motivational Speaker and Wellness Expert
(MBBS, PG.DPM, M.D.(Mind Mantra Wellness Concepts - Mumbai))

Website - www.mindmantra.in
Email - eksoch@gmail.com
WELLNESS CLINIC Address- 15, shreeji plaza, Next to Seawood Station (east), Navi Mumbai, Mumbai (India)

Facebook - http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/mindmantra.in
Facebook Group - https://www.facebook.com/groups/172863752767481/

Misdirected Passion

Ajay Devgan, Priyanka Chopra and Amitabh Bachchan have confessed to have different degrees of it.
OCD is one of the most common emotional issues which 90% people never get treatment for.
As you can see from the picture of the PET Scan attached, the brain of individuals with OCD is in a hyperactive mode and needs to be controlled.
Unfortunately PET scans cost a lot and not available everywhere... This is the kind of information which neuro-psychiatrists/ neurologists read for years together to have the ability to diagnosis and treat your problem.
Every OCD symptom tells a story. It tells which part of the brain is affected. It tells which specific treatment (medical or counseling) will work.

Henceforth, every person requires a personalized and specifically designed treatment.

Medicines are just helpful, they aint the ultimate cure.

Broadly, OCD symptoms can be categorised as:
1. Recurrent thoughts, images, or impulses that are experienced as intrusive and inappropriate, causing marked anxiety or distress
2. these are more than simple worries about life.
3. A person puts in all efforts to ignore, suppress, or neutralize these thoughts but fails on the same.
4. Most people Recognize this to be a product of their own mind
5. Compulsions may be present or not. They are behaviors or acts that you feel driven to perfom although may recognize them as senseless or excessive. At times you may try to resist doing them but this may prove extremely difficult. You may experience anxiety that does not diminish until the behavior is completed.
6. Such an emotional and behavioral pattern subjects a Person to develop extreme fear, negativity, decreased self-worth, introvert lifestyle, sadness and loneliness.

The most common OCD patterns observed are:
a. cleaning and keeping things in order- observed in housewife
b. sexual thoughts and masturbation
c. washing hands or taking bath
d. checking - locks, switches, etc
e. special sequence of numbers/words to be repeated before and after an action
f. mental list reviewing or mental list making.
d. constant recurrent memories of traumatic experiences in life.

for any further assistance on the same, contact me -

Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com
website - www.mindmantra.in

Love - the universal Language

There is only one Universal Language spoken across all boundaries of species, race, religion and sex... the language of LOVE !!!

Dr.Hemant Mittal (Neuro-Psychiatrist)
website - www.mindmantra.in
email - eksoch@gmail.com

What Clinical Depression does to Bollywood Stars.. Are you Safe?

This photo was taken yesterday (26-01-2012). Published in yahoo.co.in

CLINICAL DEPRESSION is a Clinical Disorder that doesn't see age, social-status or gender.
This is Manisha Koirala, a very successful bollywood actress, who today is fighting against Clinical Depression.
She is lucky to have friends in Mumbai who understand her...Friends that belong to a social strata where people understand that taking the help of a therapist (Psychiatrist or Counselor) is for their own personal and professional betterment...
But you or someone you know might not be so lucky... You might not have people around you who understand the gravity of emotional pain you are going through...
You might be living a life of sadness, despair, angst and self-pity... crying it out daily... spending the day drained in a sea of thoughts... your brain ADDICTED TO NEGATIVITY ... loosing your sleep... constant comparing yourself to others and killing your body by altered appetite and weight changes... searching for that one helping hand...
IF you are suffering from it.. or you know someone suffering from the same... GO OUT AND GET HELP!!! YOU DESERVE A LIFE FULL OF HAPPINESS.. and a good neutral, non-judging listener can make all the difference... Medications are no longer confined to sedative and tranquilizer, even adequate Nutritional supplements in the right quantity can give your brain that boost...

If you dont have the courage to seek professional help personally, email me, I will help you -
Dr.Hemant Mittal (neuro-psychiatrist)
email - eksoch@gmail.com
website - www.mindmantra.in

5 common Gastric Problems that start in your Mind

" A powerful Mind automatically translates into a powerful body".

Every year at the Mind Mantra wellness clinic, I meet hundreds of individuals whom only complain about gastric (stomach) troubles. Their health cases revolve around the desperate search for a permanent diagnosis and cure of the symptoms. The majority, have already undergone lengthy investigations without positive results... Even more shockingly most self-medicate with anti-acids liquids, capsules like omeprazole or tab. like rantac, taken at a daily basis for years together.

So now you may wonder, If they have gastric problems, why do they visit a psychiatrist?

well the answer is simple - when the entire medical science has professionally and economically taken complete advantage of a patient without giving him/her a respectful solution, they very conveniently diagnose the problem as stress related and refer to a psychiatrist.(frankly something that could have been done at first visit itself)

Second question you might have, How does the brain have any effect on the stomach... aren't they two different organs miles apart?

True, they are two different organs. But they are inter-dependent on each other. Without going into the technical aspects and bombarding you with big medical names. Let me explain you in a very simple way.

Before we start, just remember that the brain is the greatest consumer of nutrients, energy and chemicals in your body.

When you are subjected to continuous stress, sadness, worry, restlessness, never-ending thoughts and/or fear for more than a week, your mind becomes clouded with thoughts. This increased mental activity triggers the brain to work upto 100 times of its regular pace. Like any other organ, hyperactivity for the brain means, increased need of energy, nutrients and chemicals.

Being the largest consumer of the above mentioned, the brain automatically triggers every single process within its control to procure these. This leads to the following gastric troubles.

The 5 most common gastric issues that are caused by hyperactivity of Mind-Brain-Body interaction?

As mentioned above a hyperactive brain has very high needs of nutrients, chemicals and energy. To satisfy the same, the brain modulates various processes within the body, leading to:

1. Increased appetite and weight gain – triggering the brains appetite centre is the easiest way to gather the deficiencies. This creates sudden urges within an individual when it’s impossible to stop himself/herself from eating. Analysis by a psychiatrist of the eating patterns, the types of foods gorged on, the time and frequency of meals, etc all these indicate the extent of harm done by stress/depression over the brain, the area of the brain involved and future complications it can cause.

2. Increased Acidity – Acidic burps, nausea, burning sensation in the stomach region are all symptoms of extreme acid production by the stomach.
The stomach is the first place inside the body where foods digestion starts. Increased production of acid is a trigger by the brain to hurry up the process of food digestion. Once the food has been digested the residual or continual acid production causes erosion and damage to the stomach wall. This is experienced as burning sensation, acidic burps, nausea, etc.. and it can lead to ulcers.

Most people fight it by taking some instant relief medicine. Unfortunately that’s not the cure.

3. Constipation - The intestines are the major organ involved in nutrients absorption. High energy requirements force the brain to order the intestines to quickly absorb energy rich chemicals first. Once the energy rich chemicals are absorbed, the brain cuts energy supply towards the intestines causing them to work sluggishly. This sluggishness leads to constipation.

4. IBS or irritable Bowel Syndrome – abdominal pain, bloating, diarrhea or constipation. Increased nervousness, restlessness and thoughts trigger the secretion of hormones that harm the functioning of the intestine.

5. Nervous Stomach or a stomach constantly experiencing Abdominal Pain, fullness, bloating, belching and flatulence – The hyperactive brain is more focused on regulating self processes, which eventually decreases production of various hormones and chemicals that are essential for the gastric system. This eventually leads to one or more of the above symptoms whenever the stress levels are high.

The solution ?

The solution for the problem is as following:

a. Fight your stress, depression, restlessness, anxiety, tensions, etc in a professional way.

b. Meditation and yoga helps your brain calm down the hyperactivity.

c. Nutrition should be according to your persona. Not what has been suggested in general.. A personalized diet chart, helps you enjoy all foods and get all positive chemicals.

d. Follow what movie stars, high society and high intellect people do. – They Consult a mind-body medical consultant.

“The more in taboo you will live, the more you will suffer.

The more happiness you will seek, the more you will get.”

For any further discussion on the above contact me-

When you lose faith remember him?

The NEXT time YOU loose faith in god, remember this child... HE is going through emotional pain you can never ever imagine... but he still hasn't lost his faith and hope - (www.mindmantra.in ~ Dr.Hemant Mittal)

Find out your Stress Levels

A simple test to find out HOW STRESSED YOU TRUELY ARE?

Find your STRESS INDEX?

Scoring - 1 is Less True or not applicable, while 5 is Mostly True

A close family member died in the past 12 months. - 1 2 3 4 5

I moved to a new town in the past 12 months. - 1 2 3 4 5

I changed jobs in the past 12 months. - 1 2 3 4 5

My son/daughter left home in the past 12 months. - 1 2 3 4 5

A close friend/family member who is ill depends on you for care.   - 1 2 3 4 5

I've had a major health problem in the past 12 months. - 1 2 3 4 5

A close relationship ended in the past 12 months.   - 1 2 3 4 5

I lost my job or retired in the past 12 months.   - 1 2 3 4 5

I got married in the past 12 months. - 1 2 3 4 5

I took on a lot of debt in the past 12 months. - 1 2 3 4 5

I got divorced or separated in the past 12 months. - 1 2 3 4 5

I lost a lot of money in the past 12 months. - 1 2 3 4 5

I have ongoing marital problems. - 1 2 3 4 5

I have ongoing sexual problems. - 1 2 3 4 5

I have ongoing financial problems. - 1 2 3 4 5

I have ongoing trouble with friends or relatives. - 1 2 3 4 5

I have ongoing problems meeting family demands. - 1 2 3 4 5

I have ongoing pressure at work or school. - 1 2 3 4 5

I have ongoing pressure with emotional problems. - 1 2 3 4 5

I am constantly facing do-or-die deadlines. - 1 2 3 4 5

__________ TOTAL SCORE (add up all numbers)

SCORING KEY

20 - 35 Virtually stress free

36 - 50 Somewhat stressful - your brain is functioning at its optimum. You need to take care of not increasing the stress-levels from here.

51 - 75 Stressed - Your brain has started over-ruling your mind. Thoughts generation is no longer just subconscious governed. The over-time working brain will very soon start affecting the sleep, memory, appetite and sexual health centers in your brain.
You need to take care consult a professional. Let me help you, email me at eksoch@gmail.com

76 - 100 Super stressed - its lucky if you haven't had a nervous breakdown by now...
Your brain is working overtime. The brain sleep, appetite, memory and sexual pleasure centers have been involved. As the day passess by the neuro-chemical state of your brain is decreasing. This is leading to decreased productivity and decreased efficiency.
let me Mind Mantra Wellness Concepts help you immediately. Let me design a personalized wellness program for you- email me at eksoch@gmail.com

this is a scientifically proven psychometric test brought to you by:

Dr.Hemant Mittal

Neuro-behavioral expert - Motivational Speaker

www.mindmantra.in

Dream Interpretation - Being Chased

Dream Interpretation -
As part of my work I get to do a lot of dream interpretation for those who consult me at my wellness clinic, its a very interesting field.. One of the most common dreams that recurrently keep troubling an individual is:

A dream in which you are being chased or attacked by either a person, a ghost or a monster.

the meaning of the dream -
your mind is in extreme turmoil.
You are either
a.excessively preoccupied with the thoughts on how someone near to you is judging you
b.you are in extreme stress due to some life event happening or about to happen.

how to treat it?
a. analyse your life, identify the cause for this unwanted high stress level. If you fail to analyse it, consult a professional or a person who can analyse the situation neutrally

b. once you have identified the problem, put a process in function to "Effectively battle" that problem.

c. if you are failing to battle that problem, than work upon your "psychological reactions" to strengthen your mind.

by-
Dr.Hemant Mittal
email - eksoch@gmail.com
website - www.mindmantra.in
Wellness Consultancy - 15, shreeji plaza, opposite seawoods station (east), navi mumbai - mumbai.

Forgiveness is something you do for Yourself

3 real life cases, whom I met and counseled at Mind Mantra Wellness Center over last week-

1. Mohan is working in the IT sector. Every night he comes home to a wonderful wife and 2 great kids. His life was living a life "socially expected". 3 weeks ago his wife came to my clinic, distraught and sad. The issue, he regularly indulges in sexual activities with "call-girls". Why? He hasn't forgiven her for having had an office affair years ago.

2. Sudha falls into the perfect "homemaker" definition. She is looked upon as super-woman by many. Under this blanket of happiness, she has been sad, lonely and fighting an angry battle against self. She has been married for 17yrs. 3yrs ago her mother-in-law pass away. She hasn't forgotten the emotional tortures the old lady inflicted upon her 16yrs ago. She still hasn't forgiven her husband, nor the deceased lady. Every day those memories flash and irritate her.

3. Rohit looks towards the new e-class mercedes benz with drooling eyes. He dreams of driving one of those beauties one day. Immediately his mind goes into a turmoil and he is clouded with anger and negativity. Without control on self, he is criticizing the unknown owner of the car. He is murmuring profanities without reason. He is angry, very angry. He is angry on his parents for forcing him into a career he hasn't been happy with. He hasn't forgiven them for his "failure" to be rich and famous.

The above 3 seeked help, because they thought it was enough of emotional, financial and sexual suffering they had gone through.
Millions out there suffer everyday...

Forgiveness is not something you do for someone else. It is something you do for yourself.

For any further discussion on the above contact me-

Dr.hemant Mittal
Neuro-Behavioural Consultant, Motivational Speaker and Wellness Expert
(MBBS, PG.DPM, M.D.(Mind Mantra Wellness Concepts - Mumbai))

Website - www.mindmantra.in
Email - eksoch@gmail.com
WELLNESS CLINIC Address- 15, shreeji plaza, Next to Seawood Station (east), Navi Mumbai, Mumbai (India)

Facebook - http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/mindmantra.in
Facebook Group - https://www.facebook.com/groups/172863752767481/

The Wellness Killers Of Corporate India

Corporate India can be called the jewel in the crown of shinning India. In the last 15yrs, Indian employees no longer harbor dreams of making it big, they are making it Big!!!

Like all good things, there are some negatives. The biggest of which is the physical, emotional, social and sexual health problems corporate employees battle.

As a Wellness Expert, at Mind Mantra Wellness Concepts, I get to interact with hundreds of corporates every year. Either through my online, workshops or even personal counseling sessions, the pattern of health issues that are destroying the wellness of corporate employees can be quantified as following:

1. Eyes - A corporate employee uses his/her eyes more than any other organ. radiation from laptops, desktops, tv screens, mobile phones are bombarding the eyes for more than 8hrs daily. This results in decreased eye-sight, headaches, lack of concentration, irritations, redness of eyes and eye infections.

2. Weight Trap - Your brain-mind complex requires upto 30-40% of body energy requirement. The brain is the most utilized organ by a corporate employee. This makes a continuous source of energy essential for effective working. Unfortunately lack of healthy food option, high energy foods are easily equated with high calorie and high fat foods.

3. Blood Circulation problems- Lack of exercise, high fat foods (whereby fat goes and deposits itself in the small crucial blood carrying arteries), high stress, all pose as road blocks for effective blood circulation. Lack of proper circulation results in skin problems, headaches, joint pains and sexual disorders.

4. The Skeleton crumbles - The calcium skeleton is the core of the human body. like the beams of a building, once it is bent, it cannot be brought back to normalcy.
Lack of proper sitting posture, lack of exercise, increased obesity, are all putting extreme pressures on the skeleton.
The rise in number of neck and lower back pains have made orthopedics the most in-demand surgeons in India.

5. Anxiety, Stress and Depression - A recent survery by leading english newspaper showed that coporate sector employees showed the lowest "happiness index" on over-all factors.
While thousands of HR's, VP's and CEO's secretly take treatment for the high stress, anxiety and depression they suffer.. they never let the same be done "professionally" for their workforce.
upto 30% of indian corporate sector is suffering from clinical levels of anxiety, depression and stress which gives rise to higher addiction, dangerous sexual adventures, high spending behavior, ideas of cheating the employer and involvement in anti-social behavior.

two or more of these factors combine to create premature aging, extreme fatigue levels, joint pains, skin problems, sexual disorders, which lead to decreased happiness and poor "future" prognosis of health.

Being a corporate employee has a sense of empowerment, but with "great power comes great responsibility"
unfortunately these so called "mature" people forget to concentrate on the responsibility towards their body-mind.

Be mature, Be responsible.. BE HEALTHY...

For any further discussion on the above contact me-

The Kitty Party Extravaganza

Today I met a really amazing couple. Affluent, well educated and who fight like two blood thirsty boxers. They have very different personalities, which could never find a middle path of happiness. Today their major issue of discussion was “The Kitty Party”.

The wife had recently been introduced into “the kitty party circuit”, an exercise the husband wasn’t too happy with. Naturally interacting with a lot of “like-minded” ladies had left an impression on her, bringing about changes in her behaviour. This was a major rebellion against the “controlling” nature of this gentleman, leading to great fights.

This was an amazing couple to interact with because I got to analyse the opposing view- points that the society harbour regarding a very important “female dominated” social exercise called The Kitty Party.

The Husbands View Point or The Orthodox View Point –

1. A group of ladies meet up to gossip.

2. Wastage of time and money.

3. It gives rise to comparison and increased materialistic desires.

4. Women discuss sex openly, making it “unholy”

5. It gives rise to unnecessary rumours that can eventually emotionally hurt someone.

The Wife’s View Point or The neo-thinker View Point-

1. “Like-minded” women, who have time and money, get to spend a fun filled afternoon. This

is a refreshing break from their mundane daily self.

2. Why should a woman depend on her husband to go out and have fun. When a group of them can do it together. It’s a symbol of their independence.

3. Interaction with women from the same social class, helps to broaden the horizon about what new trends are going on in life.

4. Discussing about sex is nothing wrong. Women also have desires.

5. Rumours and Gossiping is an essential. Women do it inside the house, so what’s wrong in doing it outside.

So when asked to give a verdict on who is right or wrong, I told them how the science of human psychology views a Kitty Party:

1. It’s a great way of increasing social interaction. As most women in a kitty party are “like-minded” and share common socio-economical backgrounds.

2. It’s shouldn’t be evaluated as a wastage of time and money, but an investment in personal development.

3. Every participant has to be aware that every single lady in that Party, will be blowing her own trumpet. 95% of the information shared is either hyped or a made-up lie.

Why is this important psychologically? Most Kitty parties involve 30-plus ladies. This group of society are young, dynamic and full of energy. Unfortunately due to the social pressures they are not allowed to express their personality to the fullest at home or workplace. A Kitty Party provides them with an excellent ego-satisfaction platform, where the need for attention, the need for interaction and the need of expression are fulfilled. This is attained by materialistic, social and physical preening.

4. Sex is a basic need. It’s also a topic of discussion that immediately releases maximum amount of “happy-chemicals” in the brain, in both men and women. Kitty Parties provide great setups to vent out “sexual anxieties”. It’s a perfect setup to discuss sex-life, sexual fantasies and sexual adventures without being judged or without facing social repercussions. If all that sexual anxiety is left to grow inside an individual, she would naturally become sad and depressed.

5. Participants of a Kitty party have to be careful. It’s obviously not a “intellectual meet” where a group of ladies will be discussing “intellectual books” over tea. It’s a party.
While one is having fun and laughing, it’s very easy to trigger negative emotions like animosity, jealousy and anger within others. This can lead to some participants using the “umbrella cover of fun and social gathering” to humiliate, spread rumours, expose family secrets and instigate others into dangerous experimentation with drugs/sex.

For any further discussion on the above contact me-

Dr.hemant Mittal

Neuro-Behavioural Consultant, Motivational Speaker and Wellness Expert

(MBBS, PG.DPM, M.D.(Mind Mantra Wellness Concepts - Mumbai))

Website - www.mindmantra.in

Email - eksoch@gmail.com

WELLNESS CLINIC Address- 15, shreeji plaza, Next to Seawood Station (east), Navi Mumbai, Mumbai (India)

Facebook - http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/mindmantra.in

Facebook Group - https://www.facebook.com/groups/172863752767481/

The Power of Being an Introvert

What is common between Hrithik Roshan, Karan Johar,. Warren Buffet, Bill Gates and a few hundred people that have either walked into my clinic or I have met them at workshops over the last few years?

They all have been Introverts at some point in their life.

If you know anyone who is an Introvert, than always keep the following 7 points in your mind:

1. Introvert - its not a disorder or mental weakness. See Warren Buffet, Bill Gates, Mukesh Ambani.. They are among the most powerful men in the world.

2. Shyness - They are not always shy. They have a problem starting or maintaining a conversation. Knowing their own short coming they prefer to keep quiet. They need to learn how to overcome this short-coming.

3. They don't talk - They love to talk. But for them to talk, they need a topic which they are comfortable with, they need a person who encourages and appreciates their views on that topic.

4. Friendships Skills - Introverts are probably the best and most loyal friends an individual could have. Since they interact and open up to only a few people, they love those people many times more than others would.

5. Social skills - If they have a problem starting or maintaining a conversation, they might just focus on speaking the relevant issues. Creating a perception of "high headiness" or "high attitude" around them.

6. They stay alone - Because people don't understand them, they develop ways of day-dreaming and staying happy within their own thoughts.

7. Don't have Fun - Their brain is sensitive to noises and high adrenaline rushes. This doesn't mean they cann't have fun. Their definition of fun is different. But if you are ready to try their way of fun, you can have the time of your life!!!

As a neuro-behavioral consultant I am thankful to every introvert who I have counseled, as he/she has thought me that if you give time to listen and understand them, don't judge them and don't discriminate them, you can help them uncover a very powerful personality.
Hrithik Roshan, Karan Johar, Warren Buffet and Bill Gates did it... so can anyone else!!

For any further discussion on the above contact me-