The weapon called - "aunty / uncle"

India is a volatile society. Now don't get me wrong.. but its a society were people are competing against each other.. There seems to a be need to hoard more and more.. Everyone wants to be on the top..
This eventually leads to a lot of over-thinking, stress and anger.

While very few people openly manifest their anger.. the concept of passive aggressive behavior is rampantly present through out the entire length and breath of the nation.
People express their anger in a "camouflaged" way.. because such people are scared to talk directly.
They love to play politics behind each others back.. they love to use sarcasm.. some like to throw tantrums... and others openly violate legal laws stretching the patience level of others.

As a psychiatrist, one of the most hilarious behaviour of passion aggression I get to observe in the Indian Society is the use of the words - Uncle or Aunty.

Its understandable if a 50-60yr old is called Uncle/aunty.. but its really funny when a
A 15yr old boy calls a 25yr guy as Uncle...
or a 20yr girl calls a 30yr old lady as Aunty.

India has perfected the use of these 2 words as a "polite way to express anger".

Such is the effectiveness of these words, that the mere mention of "uncle" suddenly induces anger into a guy.. and within seconds he will respond back by saying - "I am not uncle.. do you understand.. I am half your age.. blah blah.."
The reaction in women is 1000 times faster and more aggressive.

Since age is one of the uncontrollable factors in Human life.. The process of ageing also gives rise to anxiety.. The anxiety of losing "power and control" over the world.
Its believed by many that Youth is the only Prime of ones life.

The anger induced by the word "uncle/aunty" exposes some funny parts of human personality in case of the "victim" -
a. the lack of tolerance to insults
b. the very high need to be perceived as young, beautiful/handsome and powerful.
c. the high need for attention
d. the lack of control over anger
e. the amount of over-thinking and need for control that keeps ruminating in the mind.

As for the "aggressors", those who use this word consciously it shows -
a. high jealousy
b. inferiority complex - hence using any small or insignificant way to show them-self as better.
c. bad education - many parents teach their children to use this word in a passive aggressive way. This way the child learns how to use it to bargain with an adult.
He calls someone who helps him as - elder brother.. and someone who doesn't as "uncle"
d. lack of straight forwardness - one of the biggest problems in Indian society is that people love to do "back-bitting" and play politics. They are scared to handle situations up front.
Many people who use the word "uncle/aunty" in such a way, show a personality loaded with such cowardice.

In my Clinic I have met many people who actually have suffered from stress due to such comments.. but the saddest part is that people don't want to be upfront and helpful.. but spiteful and vengeful.

written by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)

email –
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twitter- @sai_ki_artist
(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

Clinic Address - Mind Mantra, 15,
shreeji plaza,
plot-24, sector-25,
opposite seawoods station,
Seawoods (east), Navi Mumbai, Mumbai

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