Rape and the glorification of Male chauvinism

Over the last few year, Rape has been one topic that has moved from psychiatric wards to the common man dinning table.
I remember as a young psychiatric resident, whenever we would get a patient of sexual abuse it was one of the most traumatic cases to handle.

While there might be hundreds of explanations of why rapes are on the increase in our society, the ultimate truth is that its because of the wide taught belief system of "male chauvinism" that we want to change.

what is exactly male chauvinism?
It rigid, fixed beliefs and attitudes of male superiority, associated with derogation of women.

Psychiatric studies reveal that Male chauvinism is a reaction full of stress and anger to coverup for one's own "inferiority complex".

As a psychaitrist I have been asked hundreds of times, why is "rape" and "sexual offences", higher in the northern areas of India. The truth lies within the family structure.

The northern belt of india has a family structure which still hasn't evolved. Parents aren't ready to accept children mature and as adults have the liberty to move to others places. Parents are very insecure about their old age and overtly concern who will give fire to their pyre. Hence they subconsciously create an huge dependency on the child without allowing him to think free.

Male Chauvinism arises due to a "false idea" of gender supremacy that's instilled into the minds of a young baby boy.
This idea itself arises from the insecurity parents have about their "old age". In trying to create a "support" in their old age, they fuel the "male child" with ideas of supremacy and "prince like thoughts".

A male living with a false idea of being "superior" because of his gender, naturally cannot accept competition from women. He will grow up insulting every woman and expecting every woman to "Bow" to him. He will see woman as a commodity who is expected to please him.

When woman show their own strength, such males tend to become anxious.
If woman stands up for herself, the male ego turns into anger.
Anger blinds them, and immediately seeks revenge in a form that hurts the woman for life. It pushes the mind towards sexual crimes.

Male superiority is a myth.. Male superiority is a idiotic thought process.
Politicians, Religious priests, film makers and other public figures make use of it to increase their fan-following and power.

Male superiority is a cowardice approach. Real men show their strength not physically or sexually but emotionally and mentally.

The lower the intelligence and the weaker the mind of an individual the more he will believe in Male superiority. The higher the intelligence and the stronger the mind, the more he will promote equality as he'll not be afraid.

written by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS, DPM, MD(mindmantra))
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)

email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in

twitter- @sai_ki_artist

(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

The Secret and Depression

Recently I was going through a Q&A forum based on the book - "The secret".

One of the questions asked was -
"I have depression, many people suggest me to meet a psychiatrist and take medications.. I don't want to label myself Mad!! Whats your opinion".

The answer to this question was -
If the depression is so bad that you cannot handle it talking to a psychiatrist and getting medication for depression is a sign of strength is telling the universe that we are willing to go wherever we need to, to be well, to be healed. It telling the universe I'm ready to flow in positive direction for my health and not going to resist anything required to help.

Depression is a disease just like hypertension or Diabetes. You feel good after seeking treatment for your hypertension or diabetes. You tell the universe that I accept this disease and move ahead with positive flow of energy.. Then why not do the same for Depression.

Dr.Hemant Mittal
eksoch@gmail.com

Why you Cannot Stop Complaining?

Everyone knows that one person who is constantly complaining. He/she seems to have a negative opinion about everything that comes to them.
They might be happy when their negatives come alive.. but its rare to find them positive about something.

People who complain those who have an inferiority complex.
There is a constant mental competition with their environment, and they try to find peace by pointing at the negatives.

Psychologically speaking they just like a wounded child in need of love, seeking attention and compassion.

They use complaining as a form of control, hoping to guilt others into giving them the attention, caring and compassion they seek.
Complainers take others for granted and feel they will always be their to listen to their complains.

No one likes to be taken for granted.. and thats why "chronic complainers" find themselves lonely.

Most complainers never realize their mistake, those who do make a change and become very loving. The great majority remains stagnated into their negative thoughts, achieving high levels of anxiety, stress, fear and sadness.

To stop complaining one has to work on his/her inner self. There is a need to build love, care, understanding and compassion.

They have to built a sense of independence, whereby they feel happy to give away all the above mentioned positive emotions.

Its difficult task as they have only learnt the habit of taking from others.. They find it difficult to give.

Complainers are at very high risk of developing addictions like alcohol, smoking, sex and drugs because it gives them a false wellbeing and false peace.

As a psychiatrist the prominent clinical disorders that I find most chronic complainers are -

a. Major Depressive Disorder
b. Generalized Anxiety Disorder
c. Resentment and anger against the past, due to a post-traumatic event(s) that has not been erased from their mind.

d. Inferiority complex

They say love can change anything. But everyone has a capacity to love. You can love a chronic complainer only till the point it doesn't break down your own mental peace.
Sometimes its essential for a chronic complainer to get break the cycle of complaining with the help of counseling, medications and family support.


written by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS, DPM, MD(mindmantra))
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)
email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in

twitter- @sai_ki_artist
(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

Enhance your Memory

A few months ago I was having dinner at a friends place, when he proudly called his Teenage daughter and asked her too show me what she had learnt at the new "memory increasing course".

The little kid brought out many of the material supplied to her by this "mental gym".

She had done the routine many a times, so she went to do it again.

Showing me the "magic tricks to remember anything and have the greatest memory of all".

After she finished my friend asked, what do you think doc.. isn't it amazing.. no medication.. no meditation.. just plane simple science!!!

I smiled and told him that it was quite a good show, i wonder if it will really help her.

A few days ago, the same friend called me in a frantic asking for any "magic memory pill" as her daughter probably needed more "practice with her magic memory skills".

I would like to tell that 90% of these "Brain enhancing techniques" are actually a waste of money and time. But since you will not believe me, kindly do go through them before you get a true idea.

Many people email me on tips on how to enhance memory.. while memory enhancing requires a personalised analysis of the memory of a person.. here are some simple tips I give everyone. Hope they can help you -

1. Tony, a patient of mine, was bad with numbers but he was a genius with names.
Know you memory limits - You have a certain memory capacity. You cannot increase it over night or in a few days.
Know how much you can remember.

2. Tony, was bad with numbers, good with names, and had a problem giving presentations if he hadn't prepared for it in advance.
Cramming a night or few hours before a test never worked in school.. will never work in real life.
If you over-load your brain with information, after a point it will only be in reading mode.. with no storage happening at all.
Information in small pockets is easily "digestible" by the brain.


3. Tony was always the heart of a party because he remembered movies, movie scenes and songs.. but at work people feared he would miss out on important details when he was to present a report.
Our brain is more open to learn when there is audio-visual inputs.
Its easier for the brain to remember and absorb material in audio-visual ways than reading it.

4. Tony loved to watch movies, spend private time with his wife and watch world news. This changed his sleep structure. He never got sleep before 2am. He would wake up at 7am, as he needed to catch the 8am train to work.
Sleep is the greatest key to a healthy memory. Sleep is the time when your mind gets to review important information and help consolidate it into long term.


5. Tony initially wanted to create an impression by giving presentations without any help. Gradually he kept some notes with him. Everytime he presented with notes, he grew more confident and became better.
You have been acustomed to look at memory as a tool to fight a war called exam.
Everytime a tough situation comes, one likes to go through it without any "notes".
Having small notes help refresh the memory.
When preparing for an exam or a test, keep your notes aside.. try to remember as much as you can.. and use the notes whenever you are stuck somewhere.


6. When Tony was a junior manager and made the boss presentation he remembered every part of it. But when he became the boss and delegated someone to make his presentation, he actually forgot many points.
You remember material better when we've generated it.

written by -
Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS, DPM, MD(mindmantra))
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)
email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in
twitter- @sai_ki_artist

(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

successful people vs unsuccessful people

1. Embrace change vs. Fear change

Embracing change is one of the hardest things a person can do. With the world moving so fast and constantly changing, and technology accelerating faster than ever, we need to embrace what’s coming and adapt, rather than fear it, deny it or hide from it.

2. Want others to succeed vs. Secretly hope others fail

When you’re in an organization with a group of people, in order to be successful, you all have to be successful. We need to want to see our co-workers succeed and grow. If you wish for their demise, why even work with them at all?

3. Exude joy vs. Exude anger

In business and in life, it’s always better to be happy and exude that joy to others. It becomes contagious and encourages other to exude their joy as well. When people are happier they tend to be more focused and successful. If a person exudes anger, it puts everyone around them in a horrible, unmotivated mood and little success comes from it.

4. Accept responsibly for your failures vs. Blame others for your failures

Where there are ups, there are most always downs. Being a leader and successful businessperson means always having to accept responsibility for your failures. Blaming others solves nothing; it just puts other people down and absolutely no good comes from it.

5. Talk about ideas vs. Talk about people

What did we all learn in high school? Gossip gets you nowhere. Much of the time it’s false and most of the time it's negative. Instead of gossiping about people, successful people talk about ideas. Sharing ideas with others will only make them better.

6. Share data & info vs. Hoard data & info

As we all learned in kindergarten, sharing is caring. In social media, in business and in life, sharing is important to be successful. When you share you info and data with others, you can get others involved in what you are doing to achieve success. Hoarding data and info is selfish and short-sighted.

7. Give people all the credit for their victories vs. Take all the credit from others

Teamwork is a key to success. When working with others, don’t take credit from their ideas. Letting others have their own victories and moments to shine motivates them and in the long term, the better they perform, the better you'll look anyway.

8. Set goals and life plans vs. Do not set goals

You can't possibly be successful without knowing where you're going in life. A life vision board, 10 year plan, 3 year forecast, annual strategic plan, and daily goal lists are are useful tools of the mega-successful people in your life. Get your vision and goals down on paper!

9. Keep a journal vs. Say you keep a journal but don’t

Keeping a journal is a great way to jot down quick ideas or thoughts that come to mind that are not worth forgetting. Writing them down can lead to something even greater. You can even use mobile apps or your Notes function in your phone. But don’t fool yourself by saying you keep a journal and not following through.

10. Read every day vs. Watch TV every day

Reading every day educates you on new subjects. Whether you are reading a blog, your favorite magazine or a good book, you can learn and become more knowledgeable as you read. Watching television, on the other hand, may be good entertainment or an escape, but you'll rarely get anything out of TV to help you become more successful.

11. Operate from a transformational perspective vs. Operate from a transactional perspective

Transformational leaders go above and beyond to reach success on another level. They focus on team building, motivation and collaboration across organizations. They're always looking ahead to see how they can transform themselves and others, instead of looking to just make a sale or generate more revenue or get something out of the way.

12. Continuously learn vs. Fly by the seat of your pants

Continuously learning and improving is the only way to grow. You can be a step above your competition and become more flexible because you know more. If you just fly by the seat of your pants, you could be passing up opportunities that prevent you from learning (and growing!)

13. Compliment others vs. Criticize others

Complimenting someone is always a great way to show someone you care. A compliment gives a natural boost of energy to someone, and is an act of kindness that makes you feel better as well. Criticizing produces negativity and leads to nothing good.

14. Forgive others vs. Hold a grudge

Everybody makes mistakes; it’s human. The only way to get past the mistake is to forgive and move on. Dwelling on anger only makes things worse - for you.

15. Keep a “To-Be” list vs. Don’t know what you want to be

A “To-Be” list is a great way to strategize for the future. I want to be an elected official one day. I want to be a TED speaker. I want to be the CEO of a public company. I want to be a great father and husband. Unsuccessful people have no idea what they want to be. If you don’t know what you want to be, how can you achieve success? What do you want to be?

16. Have Gratitude vs Don't appreciate others and the world around you.

Moments of gratitude, each and every one, transform my life each day- and unquestionably have made me more successful and more happy. The people who you are grateful for are often the ones who have a huge part in your success. Be sure to thank everyone you come in contact with and walk with a spirit of gratitude and appreciation and even wonder, about the world around you. Gratitude is the ultimate key to being successful in business and in life.

How to increase your Luck?

Recently read an amazing article on Time Magazine. It was based on the findings of Richard Wiseman. He has spent considerable time studying some very lucky people to figure out what they had in common.

Here are 4 ways in which you can increase your luck-

1) Maximize Opportunities
Logic - if you lock yourself in your house, how many exciting, serendipitous things are going to happen to you? Not many.

Lucky people create, notice, and act upon the chance opportunities in their lives.
Human Psychiatry says that certain personality types are luckier because they tend to create scenarios that maximize opportunities. These are -

1. Extroverts
2. Control over fear - fearful people tend to create dangerous scenarios in their mind and escape from a situation.
3. Adventurism - People who are open to new experiences

Mind Mantra TIP - By acting more extroverted, less anxious and more open, you can increase luck.


2) Listen To your Heart
Logic - Luck is mostly about taking decisions. If you take a decision in which the result is in accordance with what your heart desires, there is a greater chance of fighting to achieve that result.

Intuition is accepting what your heart tells you and move accordingly.

Human Psychiatry finds that- Acceptance of the outcome of your decision is the most important ways to improve intuition.

Mind Mantra Trip - Never take a decision in excited or depressed state. Give yourself 5min - meditate, clear the mind, listen to a song, have a coffee... and when your mind is diverted you'll get what your heart says about it.


3) Be Positive
Logic - You’re more likely to try new things, follow through on opportunities and have them succeed if you believe they’ll work out well.

Mind Mantra Tip - Lucky people attempt to achieve their goals, even if their chances of success seem slim. They don't give up. Persevere. They might fail but the feeling of having tried their best can make them walk through any adversity.

4) The prophets of Doom
Many astrologers, fortune-tellers and witches tend to have sessions only focusing on the negatives fortune of ones life.

Human Psychiatry- when your mind is fearful and worried about your personal/professional life, you naturally seek re-assurance.

You want someone to tell you that everything will be fine.

Bad Astrologers, fortune-tellers mostly play with fear and re-enforce your negativity by introducing more negativity in your mind.

Negativity leads to further "bad luck", as you loose hope about your life.

Hinduism says a good astrologer is someone who motivates you by showing the positives in life without charging money.

5) Bad Luck is another name for Good Luck
Most people blame, curse, swear and find faults in case of adversity. 

The easiest explanation is too blame your luck.
Bad luck is the greatest teacher you can ever have... it gives you a chance of turning the tables in your favor.

Logic - Lucky people aren’t always lucky — but they handle adversity differently than unlucky people.

Lucky people see the positive side of their bad luck.
Lucky people are convinced that any ill fortune in their lives will fade away in front of good faith and patience.

Mind Mantra Tip - The motivational stories you mostly like are the ones were an undergo goes to become a hero. Its time you turn your life into a motivational story.

Richard Wiseman mentioned that 80 percent of people who attended his Luck enhancing classes and 

enforced these principles in their life said that their luck had increased.
On average, these people estimated that their luck had increased by more than 40 percent.
Not only were they luckier, particpants also scored higher on life satisfaction.

MIND MANTRA - GO AHEAD.. MAKE YOURSELF HAPPY..LUCKY AND FORTUNATE.. IT STARTS WITH HOW YOU WORK FOR YOURSELF.. NOT BY OUTSOURCING OR BLAMING THINGS.

by -
Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS, DPM, MD(mindmantra))
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)

email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in
Twitter - @sai_ki_artist

(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

7 common ways in which Women Flirt

Flirting is a healthy exercise when within a certain limit.
Gone are the days of the "alpha-male"... women today love and enjoy flirting.
Some even take it upon as a "sport" to see how many men they can get interested.

As a psychiatrist sometimes a mall, a pub or even a movie hall becomes an amazing ground to analyse how woman are playing this "psychological game".

There are thousands of ways used. Every woman has her own moves. Each move denotes a part of her psychological self.

Here are 7 common ways I have normally seen woman use -

1. Voice - Many women modulate their voice to sound Lower, softer, sexier and/or childish-like when in front of a guy they like.
This gives an involuntary signal of being interested and at the same time fuels the male ego.
The fuelled male ego makes the guys behave "maturely and more responsibly".. in many cases only to be played by the girls wishes.


2. Hair - Fliping the hair to one side and expose the neck.. Or playing with the hair in small childish ways.
This involuntary tells a man that a woman is ready for his advances.


3. "Props". - Tees with special or irritating messages, fancy cell-phone covers, unusual jewelery, a good perfume are natural attention seeking "props".
When in a group, a girl keeps flaunting them in front of a guy they are interested, it naturally gives them a conversation starter.


4. The "selfie or usie" trick - This is one of the oldest tricks used by both man and woman.
Take a group foto or a solo one with the interested guy. Then upload it too facebook. And ask him his facebook details to tag him along.
An instant connection is made.
Since most people have a great majority of their life displayed on facebook, this gives an immediate gateway into the guys life.


5. Touch - Woman have a 6th sense. They can actually understand what is the nature of your touch. Be it a casual touch, a handshake or a hug, they understand if you are being friendly or sexually interested.

In the same way, they have an amazing sense on how to use their touch to create various levels of interest.
A simple handshake can be a simple hello or a more intimate invitation.
This is a difficult type of flirting because it conflicts with personalities and requires a lot of acting.
Woman with direct and upfront type of personality might have a "very professional and stay away" type of touch.
While attention seeking personalities might seem to be "interested" in everyone.

One has to be careful using this method. In my psychiatric practice I have met many woman who have landed themselves in trouble because of wrongly using it.


6. The Glance - Eye to eye contact is another old technique.
A quick lock and glance away normally makes most guys look back the second time.
If the second time, the body language is more relaxed and/or more inviting, it usually signals for a guy to approach.

This is a very powerful way mechanism, because those who can speak the language of the eyes can actually guide the interested guy onto the dance floor, next to the swiming pool or a secluded place where they can talk.


7. The cheesy Pickup lines - Contrary to popular believe Girls also love to use pick-up lines.. These chessy one liners are no longer a copyright of the male gender.

"Hello XYZ... how are you??... oh!! I'm sorry I confused you for a friend of mine.. you guys look so alike".

"Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile."

"I like serious people.. By the looks You surely take your workout seriously"

Flirting is a healthy exercise when within a certain limit... Flirting is a way of spreading Love when done without malicious intent.
I have treated many cases where flirting was used on "simple guys" which eventually lead to disastrous consequences.

Flirting is powerful.. Flirting is fun... Enjoy Healthy flirting... Spread Infinite love..

written by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS, DPM, MD(mindmantra))
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)
email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in

Twitter - @sai_ki_artist
(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

female flirting

“I use my voice!”

“When I’m around a guy I like, I lower my voice to make it sound sexier. He inevitably leans in closer and responds. It’s a sure-shot trick that always works for me!” —Zain, 18




Why it works:

According to US-based Dating Coach Amy Waterman, “Guys sometimes fall for the girl who acts like a tough chick, but mostly guys fall hardest for the soft girl with a pleasing personality. Speaking in a softer, huskier tone comes across as more sensuous and less threatening.”


“I use my hair to my advantage.”

“While I’m talking to a guy, I casually flip my hair to one side and expose my neck. I’ve noticed this move always gets him to pause and appreciate mid-sentence!”




Why it works:

According to experts, when a woman exposes a sensitive area like her neck (also her collarbone), she is putting herself in a vulnerable position and telling a guy she’s open to his advances. The neck is also one of the most kissable area’s of a woman’s body, and drawing attention to it will make him imagine how it would feel to kiss you there.


“I bring along cute ‘props’.”

“When I know I’ll be meeting guys, I put on a quirky tee or a cute hat. And most of the times, I have a cute guy ask me about it.” —Snigdha, 22 —Mansi, 25




Why it works:

US-based relationship expert Fran Greene explains why this trick works: “Props are natural conversation starters. They encourage questions, and others will be compelled to start talking to you. Great props include unusual jewellery, a fabulous scent, a sweatshirt that screams your hobby,

hats, or a really interesting book.”




“I look away!”

“One secret move I always pull on a guy I’m interested in—I appear distracted while talking to him, like I have a lot on my mind. Works like a charm, because it gets him interested and wondering ‘What’s she thinking?’” —Bhagyalakshmi, 21




Why it works:

Lauren Frances, author of Dating, Mating, And Manhandling: The Ornithological Guide To Men, explains: “Psychologically, men demand attention (though they might not be so willing to give it), and a great way to get his attention is to appear mildly disinterested. Reverse psychology rings true for this scenario, where he will be dying to know what’s on your mind.” He will definitely try to figure out what you’re thinking of and why its not him. Plus, this trick is way of ensuring he knows you’ve got a busy life and so much more to do with you time, yet you choose to spend time with him, so he should treat you well.




“I carry a camera.”

“At a party, I ask a hot guy to take a picture of me and my friends. After he shoots, I ask him to jump in. We’ll look over the photos together, and then I’ll get his Facebook page details to tag him in the album.” —Suheena, 22




Why it works:

Author and relationship expert Joseph Matthews says, “Facebook is one of the greatest tools anyone hoping to improve their success with dating could ever hope to have. It provides a non-invasive portal for you to share information and get to know someone you just met and take it to the next level.” (Also helps you figure out if they’re psycho stalker or not!)


“I use touch.”

“After having interacted for a while, I make it a point to casually touch a guy’s arm while talking. I think it lets him know I’m comfortable around him.”




Why it works:

According to dating advice expert and author of Love In 90 Days, Dr Diana Kirschner: “Touch is a very important part of letting your partner know you are interested and that you are not afraid to make the first move. Though it is one of the more positive signs of flirting, be careful to send across the right kind of message. Keep your touch gentle and brief.”




“I leave!”

“I never stick around for too long once I’ve met someone. After a brief chat, I make my way out. If he’s into me, the guy responds by asking for my number or offering me his card.” —Neha, 20


Why it works:

US-based dating counsellor Dr Asher Malderan says: “Sometimes, leaving will make the person give you their number, ask you to stay, or they may just leave with you. If you two need more time before taking it to the next level and the person obviously likes you, offer to take them for coffee and leave the place that you’re at. This way, you have time alone and things can progress from there.”


“I use my eyes.”

“Playing hide and seek with the eyes is my favourite flirting game! I get his attention for a few seconds, smile, then quickly look away. He’s always waiting for me to look back again.” —Anshum, 28




Why it works:

Smart move, says Greene. “Looking your interest in the eye and then glancing away tells him two things: that you find him interesting, and you’d like him to take the lead. Be careful not to stare, though—it’s a turn-off.”




“I pretend!”

“I try this when I go out to a club or bar—I tap a cute guy on the shoulder and when he turns around, I feign surprise and exclaim, ‘I’m sorry, I thought you were XYZ!’ We usually wind up bonding over how I know his back-of-head twin and eventually exchange numbers!” —Swarnakshi, 19


Why it works:

“If you can make ‘accidental’ run-ins look genuine, this is an innocent and friendly way of initiating a conversation and leading to a prospective date,” says Waterman. Just one word of advice: make sure you don’t go overboard and claim anything unrealistic like, “I’m sorry, I thought you were my uncle’s boss’s nephew’s best friend!” Keep it short and cute, and he’ll be more interested in you than your story.


“I split up.”

“My girlfriends and I have a rule—every time we go out, we split up for 20 minutes at the bar and give the men a chance to make a move. If someone comes up, great! If not, we meet up again and have a great night anyway! —Meghna, 21


Why it works:

According to dating coaches and authors Ron Louis and David Copeland, “While going out alone might not be the safest idea in today’s world of dating, when you are out with your friends, you should separate yourself from them a bit to seem more approachable by men. Men might feel too intimidated to approach you if you’re with a group of girls, and might worry that they stand to be be rejected not only by you, but a whole group of women. So, take every opportunity to venture to the pool table, bar or patio alone for a few moments at a time and don’t forget to smile.” Wondering what to do for those 20 minutes when your friends aren’t around? Simply look around the room for a few minutes, lock eyes with a cute guy then look away, or check your phone for new messages (only for a few seconds). Whatever you do, it’s important that you face the crowd so you seem more approachable.

The Myth - Love is freedom.

Many great philosophers have said that the purest form of Love is one were you and your partner are free.

There is individuality which leads to a great sense of bonding.

But does this type of love exist???

As a psychiatrist I would say NO!!!

I meet hundreds of couples yearly.. some who come to me for counseling, others who I meet unofficially.. and others who are within my friend circle.. all them have one thing in common - BOUNDARIES.

Boundaries make people secure. Boundaries make people happy.
By establishing them, you make an unsaid agreement.
Boundaries are a grown up version of the childhood play, when you and your best friend shared something which no one else knew about...
Its a secret way of reassuring each other.

Boundaries give a sense of ownership over your partner.

Boundaries have a certain flip side. -
when there is too much freedom in a relationship - boundaries are broken while taking the other person for granted. This eventually leads to a severe psychological deficit.
For example - A couple who share a great rapport and give each other a lot of freedom of expression, might land up messing up their relationship when a 3rd person comes in-between and flirts excessively with one of them.
The flirting will initially be discarded as rubbish.. but slowly slowly will be perceived as "cheating".

when there is more ego involved in a relationship - boundaries become smaller and stricter.. A point comes when they start to strangulate your psychological self.
For example - when one is suspicious of his/her partner. They will ask too many questions, follow them, try and confirm every movement..

Boundaries are important in a relationship.. But its important that the couple defines these boundaries properly.

Manipulators are psychological leeches who push one to break these boundaries... eventually creating a dependency on self.

by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS, DPM, MD(mindmantra))
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)

email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in

Twitter handle - @sai_ki_artist

(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email... all information will remain confidential)

The Fake Spirituals

There are many people who walk the world using spirituality as an excuse.
These people are "fake spirituals".

They love to indulge in materialistic pleasure but will use spirituality as an explanation to their jealousy, guilt and anger.

I remember counseling a "corporate employee" who loved to spend all his money on electronic gadgets, but would call those who smoke and drink as "sinners who just indulge in addictions".

A girl would preach about studying and getting married to a good guy, but her entire room was full of love stories and everyday she indulged for hours thinking about "her charming knight in shinning armour".

A guy would say its sin to look at girls and would keep distance from them. But at night would sit and watch pornography for hours.

The society loves hypocrisy. Everyone preaches to rise above physical self and basic instincts.. but the very people who preach this indulge in the same secretly.

A lady came to my clinic and spent 1hr explaining how she was above money and materialism. She felt her mother-in-law never understood her. As soon as it came to paying my fees, she suddenly started complaining about money and wanted to bargain.

I met a pundit who preached about how society was deteriorating and gave big lecture on following the virtues of the "vedas".. .15min when a beautiful lady was serving him food, he was looking at her with lustful eyes.

Millions of people pray to god..donate billions of rupees blindly to "gurus" whose credentials have never been question.. because they are scared if they don't pray something wrong will happen to them.. Its really ironic, isn't god the other name for love... and love has no punishment.. it only has forgiveness.

By attending a "satsang" or by preaching the same that you heard from a "guru" doesn't make you spiritually high.

Seeking higher virtues and spiritual highness is very difficult... because it requires acceptance of yourself, acceptance of your flaws and detachment from everything. Till there is a single trace of attachment you'll never move high. So you cannot preach.

No matter how “loving,” “nice” and “sweet” you look on the outside, your raw needs will make you attracted to lust, anger and ego.

The moment you accept that lust, anger and ego are part of you... then you'll learn that they will bring you both happiness and sadness. When you learn to accept both happiness and sadness as part of your own perception, you'll learn to enjoy living.

Till then you'll keep struggling... fighting just to prove yourself to be superior to other by use of words which you might practice in action but not by heart.


written by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS, DPM, MD(mindmantra))
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)
email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in
clinic address- 15, shreeji plaza, next to ice n spice restaurant, opposite seawoods station, seawoods (east)
Navi Mumbai

(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

Cell-Phone Relationships

Cell-phones have become an extension of your mind and expression.
More and more people are creating emotional and psychological attachments through whatsapp, facebook messenger, BBM or wechat.

I have met hundreds of men and women who are having or are suffering due to a "cell-phone relationship".
Neuroscientists have proved that even with no physical contact, the emotional attachment through communication by these messenger services, produces the same chemical reactions in the brain, as while having sex with that individual.

Hence whatsapp, BBM or wechat, are creating "emotional relationships", which most think are "harmless".

The Denial Trap -
99% involved in "cell-phone relationships" deny it, for there is no "sex" involved.
Their obsession for the "cell-phone partner" over-clouds their entire about "real life" and real-life relationships.

Common Behavior Patterns -
1. Spending more than 2-3hours a day chatting with your “cell-phone friend.”
2. Throughout the day, your mind is preoccupied with thoughts about your ”cell-phone friend”.
3. If there is resistance from family, friends or spouse... the "interaction" is kept secret..
Changing all your account passwords, creating new social networks/email accounts, concealing emails, changing his/her name on the blackberry messenger, etc.

4. High irritation or anger if your questioned about your cell-phone friend.
5. Restlessness if not heard from him/her within a few hours.
This restlessness calms only after contacting him/her.
6. Higher comfort level in sharing your thoughts with your "cell-phone friend", through whatsapp than talking it out with your friends/partner.
7. Tunnel vision - Discount all negatives of your cell-phone friend. Become over-critical about your real-life family/partner.
8. While having sex/masturbating your mind flashes the desire of being with your “cellphone friend”.
9. Sharing sensitive information like provocative photos, bank or other financial details, personal body details or professional secret details with your ”cellphone friend”.
10. Constantly planning to arrange business meetings, conferences or visits to spend time alone with your ”cell-phone friend”.
11. Constant denying to any emotional attachment to your ”cell-phone friend”, while you still spend most time in the day thinking, talking or chating with him.


Reason -

Emotional Addiction to the “cell-phone friend” makes you emotionally numb to everyone else.
Feeling irritation, critical or angry towards those who don't share your "vision" about him/her.
The brain becomes addicted to this "friend", making it more and more difficult to detach from him.
You find reasons and ways to avoid real life.
Fake and stupid ideas become explanations about "Great ideas" being discussed.
"cellphone relationships" are for real, and they are destroying marriages, destroying social self and destroying people.
Many manipulators are making use of the same to drag individuals into financial, psychological and sexual blackmailing.

Thanks for reading, your queries are welcome @-

Dr.Hemant Mittal
(Psychiatrist,Motivational Writer/Speaker and Counselor)
email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – http://mindmantra.in/services.html

personal consultation @-
address- Mind Mantra wellness clinic
Shop 15, shreeji plaza, next to ice n spice restaurant,
opposite seawoods station,
seawoods (east)
Navi Mumbai – 400706

Online Extra-marital affair.

Whenever someone talks about an “extra-marital affair” or “cheating in a relationship”, the thought automatically moves towards “sex.”.

People forget to look towards the a more common form of cheating - “emotional or psychological cheating”.

Cyber-cheating or Online extra-marital affair is a reality that's affecting millions of homes!!

Even with no physical contact, the emotional attachment produces the same chemical reactions in the brain, as while having sex with that individual.

Facebook, Messengers - whatsapp, BBM, wechat, are fuelling such relationships in every other living room.

The Denial Trap -
99% involved in "online relationships" deny it, for there is no "sex" involved.
Their obsession for the "online partner" slowly over-clouds their entire "real life" relationships.

Common Behavior Patterns -
1. Spending more than 2-3hours a day chatting or exchanging sms/messages with your “online friend.”

2. Throughout the day, your mind is preoccupied with thoughts about your ”online friend”.

3. If there is resistance from family, friends or spouse... the "online interaction" is kept secret.
Changing all your account passwords, creating new social networks/email accounts, concealing emails, changing his/her name on the blackberry messenger, etc.

4. High irritation or anger if your suddenly questioned about your online friend or online activity.

5. Restlessness if not heard from him/her within a few hours.
This restlessness calms only after contacting him/her.

6. Higher comfort level in sharing your thoughts with your online friend than your friends/partner.

7. Tunnel vision - Discount all negatives of your online friend. Become over-critical about your partner.

8. While having sex your mind flashes the desire of being with your “online friend” instead.

9. Sharing sensitive information like provocative photos, bank or other financial details, personal body details or professional secret details with your ”online friend” without having verified his/her credentials.

10. Constantly planning to arrange business meetings, conferences or visits to spend time alone with your ”online friend”.

11. Constant denying to any emotional attachment to your ”online friend”, while you still spend most time in the day thinking, talking or chating with him.

Reason -
Emotional Addiction to the “online friend” makes you emotionally numb to everyone else. Feeling irritation, critical or angry towards those who don't share your "vision" about him/her.

The brain becomes addicted to this "online friend", making it more and more difficult to detach from him and involve yourself in your real life.

Thanks for reading, your queries are welcome @-

Dr.Hemant Mittal
(Psychiatrist,Motivational Writer/Speaker and Counselor)

email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – http://mindmantra.in/services.html

personal consultation @-
address- Mind Mantra wellness clinic
Shop 15, shreeji plaza, next to ice n spice restaurant,
opposite seawoods station,
seawoods (east)
Navi Mumbai – 400706

Talent doesn't guarantee you success

I meet many people who are very talented but are wasting their time..
They feel their talent is not being appreciated and they are not succeeding as much as those lesser talented.

1. life is not fair, if you don't make it fair.
2. your talent needs to be advertised, else no one will know about it.
3. don't let your talent be taken for granted and others take undue advantage of the same.
4. Just because you were born talented doesn't mean you are the best, there will be someone working harder than you, that person will succeed.

Discipline, long term planning, hard work and street smartness are essential for success.
They are a life-style not something you develop over-night.

written by -
Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS, DPM, MD(mindmantra))
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)

email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in

clinic address- 15, shreeji plaza, next to ice n spice restaurant, opposite seawoods station, seawoods (east)
Navi Mumbai

(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

Forgiveness - the tough task

Many of my patients suffer from the "ill" or "evil" done by others.
Because many a times they are not able to "re-pay" or "punish" those who have given them pain, their mind is continuously wandering in the past.

The emotional pain doesn't leave them, giving rise to anger, anxiety and depression.

Everyone talks about Forgiveness.
After all its supposed to a step progressive in personality development.
All religions preach the act of forgiveness and many people are told to forget everything in the "name of god".

Sometimes it is very difficult to forgive.
If we believe somebody has harmed us in the past, then despite wanting to forgive, we are not able to do so.

Generally, people equate forgiving someone with a personal defeat, declaring ‘I lost against somebody who harmed me’ or saying ‘you win’. Sometimes, there is anger too. If we forgive someone, we believe the person will be left scot-free of punishment for her deeds. We end up nurturing negative emotions like resentment, anger and hate, which later manifest as diseases in our bodies.

Forgiveness is a choice.. its a charity that always begins from home. When we choose to forgive, you Shed Negativity, and start healing your mind and body.

By forgiving, we clear our own path of growth. It’s a favour we do ourselves. We can create growth and balance in our environment if we are free from blockages. When we forgive, we set ourselves free.

Forgiveness is to Be Connected with Yourself - You made mistakes.. others made mistakes.. accept them.. move ahead.
you need to become disconnected from them.. you need to move away from them... you need to balance your life.
You might be called selfish.. You might be called independent.. you might be called many names.. but its something you do for your mental peace.
As your mental peace is something no one else will understand.

Dr.Hemant MittaL (psychiatrist - counselor)
(http://www.mindmantra.in/)

Contact at –
Email – eksoch@gmail.com
Twitter –https://twitter.com/Sai_Ki_Artist

clinic address- 15, shreeji plaza, next to ice n spice restaurant, opposite seawoods station, seawoods (east)
Navi Mumbai

Victims of Blinded psychological outlook

Tony (name changed) was under tremendous pressure to make money and be a good husband.
He had been trying for 4yrs but his relationship was fading away.
He came to consult me after attempting suicide.

He was married at 26, but by 31 he was exhausted from the relationship.
He wanted to live life on his terms, but marriage, children had destroyed his desires.
He was living in self-pity, angry against his parents and abusive against his wife.
He had no love left for anyone, not even himself.
He just wanted to live his life or end his life.

Its sad but In India many men and women are married just to satisfy their parents "need".
There is no psychological approach to judge if the person is ready for marriage or not.

Indian society is very funny, because a great number of adults consider a young man/woman "mature" only after he/she has got married and had sexual relationships with their spouse.

People are so fearful to talk about sex.. that marriage automatically equates to happiness because its a licence to have sex.

There are millions of Tony's out there..
Millions who are suffering from clinical depression..
Millions who want to break free from the shackles of marriage..
Millions who just want to live life their way.

Freedom is our birth right...!!!

Dr.Hemant Mittal
(Psychiatrist, Counselor and Motivational Writer)
eksoch@gmail.com
www.mindmantra.in

Faking an illness

Munchausen syndrome is a serious mental disorder in which someone with a deep need for attention pretends to be sick or gets sick or injured on purpose.

Patients presents with false or grossly exaggerated physical or psychological symptoms, motivated by external incentives such as getting attention or avoiding work.

Symptoms may include:

1. Dramatic stories about numerous medical problems
2. Frequent hospitalizations
3. Vague or inconsistent symptoms
4. Conditions that get worse for no apparent reason
5. Eagerness to undergo frequent testing or medical procedures
6. Gathering medical knowledge on diseases and using it as explanation of his/her symptoms
7. Seeking treatment from many different doctors or hospitals
8. Frequent argument or fight with health providers, specially when they discover the truth about their disease.
9. Frequent requests for pain relievers or other medications

Cause:
- deep fear of abandonment or being left alone for which they seek re-assurance by craving for attention.
- attention seeking behavior clouds their mind and they end up creating stories or harming themselves to "portray" to be "ill".

Treatment -

1. Anti-depressant and anti-anxieties are given to help calm the mind.
2. counseling is done for both family and patient to help them understand its a medical problem.
3. hospitalization in severe cases.

written by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS, DPM, MD(mindmantra))
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)

email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in

clinic address- 15, shreeji plaza, next to ice n spice restaurant, opposite seawoods station, seawoods (east)
Navi Mumbai

(feel free to ask your questions/feedback through email)

Body Language - 5 simple facts you should know

1. Touch
How you touch another person reveals how you feel toward them.
When you make full contact with your palm, this communicates warmth, familiarity and fondness.
Touching with only your fingertips means less fondness, maybe even some discomfort.

When a person touches you and you notice that his hands are warm, this tells you he is more or less at ease.
Cold, clammy hands mean he is tense – not necessarily because of you, but possibly because of the circumstances.

2. Clenched fists
Clenched fists with thumbs tucked out usually mean firmness of resolve.

Clenched fists with thumbs tucked-in indicate discomfort. This person is anxious or angry and trying to calm himself.

3. Chopping movements with hands
Chopping is for emphasis, and is usually present in people who are very rigid about their thought process.

If you use this gesture, just don’t be too aggressive when you do it.

4. Finger Pointing
Pointing a finger at a person while speaking is an authoritative gesture. People do this when imposing themselves: parents do it to their children, teachers to unruly students.
It’s usually interpreted as aggressive and angry, a show of arrogance – it can easily make the other person go into a confrontational, invasive or offensive mode.

5. Rubbing hands together
Hand-rubbing indicates anticipation or anxiety about something to come. The gestures used to dissipate stress.

6. Crackling of knuckles -
Expresses release of anxiety and readiness for action.

7. Hands on hips - sideways
This is sometimes mistaken for unfriendliness, but it’s often really just a position of readiness. This is often observed in workaholics, athletes and productive people.

8. Hands in pockets
Pocketed hands indicate unwillingness, mistrust and reluctance. If a person keeps his hands in his pockets, you will need to first gain his interest as well as his trust.

by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS, DPM, MD(mindmantra))
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)

email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in

clinic address- 15, shreeji plaza, next to ice n spice restaurant, opposite seawoods station, seawoods (east)
Navi Mumbai

THE BEGGAR WITH A HEART OF GOLD

98 year old dobri dobrev, a man who lost most of his hearing in the second world war, has spent decades traveling 25 kilometers by foot every day for decades, decked in his homemade clothes and leather shoes, from his village to the city of sofia, where he spends the day begging for money.

A well recognized fixture around several of the city’s churches, known for his prostrations of thanks to all donors, it was only recently discovered that this man, who lives entirely off his state pension of 80 euros, has donated every penny he has collected — over 40,000 euros — towards the restoration of decaying bulgarian monasteries and churches, as well as the utility bills of orphanages.

KINDNESS IS AN SELFLESS ACT FOR HAPPINESS OF OTHERS..

Most people give donations because of selfish reasons -
1. Some give donations, because they feel "superior" and more wealthy.
2. Some give donations to earn "good karma".
3. Some give it because some priest, maulana or pundit has suggested doing so will give them what they want.
4. Some give just to show-off to others "how kind hearted they are".

Only a handful people give donations with selfless attitude.
Only a handful people do selfless acts for happiness of others.

MAYBE YOU SHOULD LET A LITTLE BIT OF DOBRI DOBREV INTO YOUR HEART.

by -

Dr.Hemant Mittal (MBBS, DPM, MD(mindmantra))
(Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer and Counselor)

email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – www.mindmantra.in

clinic address- 15, shreeji plaza, next to ice n spice restaurant, opposite seawoods station, seawoods (east)
Navi Mumbai

Celebrities and OCD

1. Charlize Theron may have a tougher time than other new moms adjusting to her first child. That’s because she’s admitted to suffering from obsessive-compulsive disorder or OCD.

“I have OCD, which is not fun,” she told Australian radio show- “I have to be incredibly tidy and organized or it messes with my mind and switches off on me.”

Babies, especially once they reach toddler-hood, aren’t exactly known for their neatness.

For parents with OCD, having children can actually make symptoms worse. “OCD symptoms tend to latch on to things that are most important to us, so parents with OCD may have doubts about their abilities or intrusive thoughts about their child’s safety or hurting their child,” – Stephen Whiteside, a psychologist at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minn.

OCD is an anxiety disorder that at its basic level is a fear of one’s thoughts, whether it’s a fear of messiness, germs or something else. To relieve the anxiety associated with such intrusive thoughts, an obsessive-compulsive will feel compelled to behave in a certain way, such as cleaning out their cabinets before going to sleep or checking and rechecking their child.

2. Psychologist advice new parents with OCD: “Try to put things in perspective, reminding yourself that you’re going to do a much better job as a parent if you leave things messy and spend time with your child than being perfect… It might be uncomfortable at first, but the feeling gradually goes away, and it should get easier.”

This is how Julian Moore, overcame the toughest phase of her OCD.. she’s admitted she still “fanatical about straightening furniture and lining stuff up, but I’m much more laid back than I used to be!”

3. Girl-of-the-moment Lena Dunham talks candidly about her battle with obsessive-compulsive disorder and anxiety in the Feb. 28 issue of Rolling Stone.

In the cover story, the 26-year-old creator and star of HBO’s “Girls” says she took antidepressants in high school, and was obsessed with the number eight.

“I remember saying to my mom when I was little, ‘I just had to imagine having sex with you eight times,’” she says in the magazine, “and she really took it in stride! She was like, ‘Well, it’s your imagination; it didn’t really happen.’”

4. Megan Fox, the bombshell actress and model admitted that she has OCD.

“This is a sickness, I have an illness, this is not OK anymore,” Fox told Allure magazine. Her problem: public toilets and restaurant silverware.
The “Transformers” star told Allure that she won’t use toilets without seat covers: “I’m never doing that again. Every time someone uses a bathroom and they flush, all the bacteria is shot into the air.”

She also opened up about her feelings on restaurant silverware: “Putting my mouth where a million other mouths have been, just knowing all the bacteria that you carry in your mouth? Ucch!”

5. Jessica Alba has said her OCD came out of a need to have control over her life.

“I used to unplug every single appliance in my house. Or I’d double-check every door in my house to make sure it was locked at night,” she told CosmoGirl last year. “It was like a panic come over me and I had to do something, and once I did it, I was OK. … It was really me needing to control something.”

6. Cameron Diaz will open doors with her elbows just to avoid touching the germ-infested doorknobs. The sexy star of “Bad Teacher” and “Shrek” has admitted to cleaning the doorknobs of her Los Angeles home so much that the original paint has faded on them. She has also said she washes her hands “many times” each day.

7. Justin Timberlake, has also copped to having OCD. He was quoted by the Web site Collider.com as saying, “I have OCD mixed with ADD (attention deficit disorder). You try living with that. It’s complicated.”

8. Leonardo DiCaprio once played another famous sufferer of OCD, Howard Hughes. In fact, while playing the role, DiCaprio’s got back in touch with his own childhood obsession: sidewalks.

“I remember as a child, stepping on cracks on the way to school and having to walk back a block and step on that same crack or that gum stain,” DiCaprio told About.com at the time the Hughes biopic “The Aviator” was released.

“Let’s just say it took me a while to get to set, having to step on tons of things,” he said, laughing

9. David Beckham likes to keep his shirts in order, lining them up in the closet according to color. So do a lot of people, you say. How about matching all the food in your refrigerator? Apparently, the soccer star likes order in his fridge as well, which is why he has three.

“Food in one, salad in another and drinks in the third,” his wife Victoria Beckham said, according to the Daily Mail. “In the drinks one, everything is symmetrical. If there’s three cans of Diet Coke, he’d throw one away rather than having three — because it has to be an even number.”

“He’s got that obsessive-compulsive thing where everything has to match,” she said.

10. Billy Bob Thorton the eccentric actor-turned-musician has talked about his OCD in 2004 with “Dateline”‘s Ann Curry, saying it grew out of a difficult childhood filled with abuse.

One of his compulsions is “constantly doing mathematics,” he said. “Certain numbers represent certain people. And I can’t use that number in a certain circumstance. And then I have to use it in another circumstance.”

“It exhausts you,” he said about his disorder.

Dr.Hemant Mittal
(Neuro-Psychiatrist, Motivational Writer/Speaker and Counselor)

you can CONTACT ME on
(all conversations are kept CONFIDENTIAL) -
email – eksoch@gmail.com
website – http://mindmantra.in/services.html

or visit my wellness clinic @-
address- 15, shreeji plaza, next to ice n spice restaurant, opposite seawoods station, seawoods (east)
Navi Mumbai

FACTS

- The harder you concentrate on falling asleep, the less likely it will happen.

- The human mind spends 70% of it's time replaying memories & creating scenarios of perfect moments and situations.

- Laughing for 15 minutes benefits the human body the same as sleeping for 2 hours.

-When you wake up around 2-3 am without any reasons, there's an high chance you are remembering someone for good or bad reasons.

- Afer an argument, majority people tend to think of all the clever things they should have said.

- Listening to music has been shown to lower stress levels, lower blood pressure, increase concentration and even relieve pain.

- There's a very chance that at this stage of your life you are waiting for something that will never happen.

- Emotional pain lasts for 10 to 20 minutes, after that it cyclically keeps repeating itself in the brain.

- Most people get scared when an sms reads "can i ask you a question.

Suspiciousness is a mental health problem!

Suspiciousness is a very dangerous emotion to harbour.

As a psychiatrist I have seen not only relationships break but even murderer thoughts dominate the mind of suspicious individuals.

Suspiciousness gives rise to restlessness. The restlessness in this case gives rise to extreme negativity which eventually leads to more suspiciousness and increased anger.

Suspiciousness and Anger cloud the mind. They can be present 24hrs, running in both the conscious and unconscious mind.

The most important things to do :
1. Dont remain lonely. Share your feelings with someone you trust.
2. If becoming highly suspicious consult a psychiatrist for proper diagnosis of why its happening to you.

Dr.Hemant Mittal
( Psychiatrist and motivational writer )
eksoch@gmail.com

Rape Victim

Rape

sex has always been tabooed in india.

I remember as medical student many people from different walks of life would ask me questions regarding sex. Surprisingly many questions would show the aggression males had towards woman.

From wanting a woman to scream during sex.. to wanting her to implore for sex or she praising a male for having sex with her.. the attitude towards sex has been more of domination than love.

This attitude is further multiplied by the male prefernce the society shows.

As a psychiatrist treating rape and sexual abuse patients is really heart breaking. Beautiful lifes thrown into the dungeons of darkness by the animal instinct of a man.

Alcohol, Pornography, media, anger, personality disorders and social attitude are all factors that contribute to bring about the animal in a man.

A rapist is an animal..and their is no excuse for him.

I wish our society learns from the pain of others.

My sincere request -
1. Dont discriminate a rape victim
2. Help a rape victim
3. Show empathy.
4. Don't stop before punishing a rapist.